Nonsensilism

IBM - Idiotic Bloody Machines

2011-03-05T14:36:00.000-08:00

Good day everyone!

It is me, your long lost blogging friend. Still checking my blog every now and then? Well your patience and perseverance have paid off! Today, I return with a new post! And what compelled me to write a new post?... My new company laptop.

A couple of weeks ago, I was told that I would be getting a new laptop for work. Well it was about bloody time I say! My current laptop is a piece of shit. I've actually adopted a routine that revolves around this oldy moldy laptop. When I reach the office in the morning, I will press the power button to boot it up.

Then I go take a walk around the airport just to make sure that my operations are running smoothly.

Then I go get some breakfast.

Then I read the newspaper.

Then I go to the toilet to offload the remains of my digested breakfast.

Then I sweep the floor.

Then I clean the windows.

Then I ponder and work on my astrophysics mathematical equation that will unravel the mysteries of the universe.

Then I twiddle my thumbs for a bit.

AND THEN! Tada! The laptop will chime to say it is ready for me to log in with my username and password. Of course, by then I only have 10 mins left before I knock off from work so I will rush through my emails and finish up with whatever I can do.

So it comes as no surprise that I was pretty pleased that I would finally get a new machine so that I can chuck my current laptop into the pits of technology hell. Goodbye you stinking piece of poo.

Fast forward to 6 weeks later, a guy from UPS knocks at my office door and delivers a box with "Lenovo Thinkpad" splashed all over it. Good lord, a lenovo thinkpad? Thats exactly what the old computer was. Essentially, it was the same old IBM Thinkpad with a new name. I looked at the specs at the side of the box.

- Intel core i3 processor: Core i3?? Isn't intel rocking the core i7 chips now? What is this i3 shit?
- 2 GB memory: 2 GB?? Hey, my computer had 2 GB of RAM too.....8 years ago.
-Windows 7 professional: Goodness, they might as well install a virus that would cause the computer to self destruct once you turn it on.

An engineer was soon sent to my office to setup the new laptop. He installed all the software I required for my work and migrated my email data. Once it was done, he handed the black laptop to me and said it was ready for use. Immediately, I ran into trouble.

My email wouldn't work! All the important info and work that I needed to do were in there and it just refused to work! Instead, I was bludgeoned with error messages that I could not understand! Was it telling me that my email was setup wrongly? Was it telling me that there were corrupted files? Was it telling me that it could not detect the correct network settings? In the end, I concluded that all the gibberish that was flashing before my eyes loosely translated to "only morons will have lotus notes installed on windows 7 in a thinkpad". In fact, those 3 things on their own can be considered catastrophic. Why would you mix 3 poisons together to make an even bigger disaster??

I wanted to print out the error messages to show the technical help desk but of course, I did not have "administrative privileges" to install the printer so I had to get technical help for that too. Clicking on the "control panel" to make adjustments to the settings in the computer only made the hourglass icon spin for an eternity before anything happened. Even a snail crawling backwards from Spain to Germany would get there faster.

To cut a long story short, I spent the next 2 days over the phone with my company's IT department's helpdesk trying to get everything sorted out. Not really the technological advancement I was hoping for. In the end, I'm still stuck with rubbish that does not make my life or work easier at all. Phooey.

I sincerely hope that you guys are not facing the same crap as I am. Of course, if you're using a mac, you'll be reading this post and chuckling to yourself before moving on to do other stuff on your computer effectively and without any problems. For the rest who are using windows, your computer probably hung or flashed some error message before you even got to the end of this post.

Mountain views, wild boar for lunch and a waterfall

2010-11-03T14:48:00.000-07:00

Howdy! Como Esta?

The Sunday that just passed was pretty interesting and eventful for me. It all began with an invitation from the company lawyer to go to his holiday home up in Montseny, a mountain just north of Barcelona city. Its wild boar season in Barcelona now you see, and there's this great restaurant in Montseny that is famous for hunting wild boar, aging the meat for 2 weeks and then cooking up a mean stew with it. Fresh mountain air and wild boar stew! How could I say no?

So along with my colleague Terence, we made the one hour drive to Montseny and up to the little mountain village. The booking at the restaurant was for 1:30pm and we reached there at about a quarter past one. Before heading to the restaurant, we took in the view from John’s holiday home in the mountain.

We left John’s apartment and strolled down the little lanes of the village towards the town square. It's a quaint little Spanish mountain town. It has it's own baker, butcher, wine cellar, little grocery store and 5 restaurants. It's all little cobbled lanes and there was a little area with a sunday market going on. Very rustic!
1:30pm. We went into the restaurant and took our seats. Good thing we had a reservation coz the restaurant was small and cosy but very crowded! There was also a long line of people queueing up. You can tell that this was the right place for wild boar coz there were wild boar heads all over the place!! Can you see them? They look pretty fierce and not very happy. I guess they keep the big ones as trophies. John and his wife proceeded to order the food. They ordered salad with cold cuts, snails (yummy!!!), wild mushrooms in garlic butter and charcoal roasted bread for starters. After that we had the wild boar stew. I was so stuffed after the lunch. And the lunch lasted 2 hours plus coz everyone ate slowly and talked a lot! The European way of eating and the asian way is very different. They really eat slowly, talk a lot and sip their wine. I think we should adopt that habit. I think we eat too fast. Ok maybe this advice is more for me.

After the really full and satisfying meal, and a lot of talking about lots of random stuff, we went for a walk around the area. There are little trails all over the mountain that you can have nice walks in. There are also random springs that you can drink from! Like natural springs trickling down the rock and you just drink from it! Better than evian I reckon coz there's no weird mineral taste in the water. After about 40 mins, we finished our walk and headed back to John’s apartment for tea and coffee. It was quite nice and refreshing to have a walk with fresh mountain air after so much food.

After getting back to John’s apartment, we all sat down and chatted a bit more while John’s wife made the tea and coffee. John and Terence were talking about politics in Spain, Singapore and Malaysia. I was feeling a bit sleepy and just spaced out for a bit. Politics wasn't really my thing. In fact, being up in a mountain, I started to daydream about swooshing around on my snowboard in white powder snow, feeling the cold wind rush by, the snow spray whenever I slice through the snow to change directions. Suddenly, there was a loud bang like an explosion from the kitchen!! I was jolted from my daydream (which ended with a volcano eruption thanks to the bang). We all rushed in and almost immediately there was water everywhere!! The water pipe in the heater unit had burst and there was water gushing everywhere! At the same time, the electricity went out and as the sun was already setting, the whole apartment was very dark. Everyone was shocked and John was frantic. The apartment was getting seriously flooded! While John’s wife was frantically calling for help on the phone, John, Terence and I were trying to contain the water by mopping the floor and throwing towels around and trying to catch the gushing water in pails and bailing them in the sink. My snowboarding thoughts were somehow replaced by one of me surfing the waves in summer now. Bizarre how my brain can still daydream in the midst of a crisis. Anyway, water was flooding the whole apartment! We were ankle deep in water! It was such a sudden and shocking event! We were probably at it for a good 20 mins before someone finally showed up and turned off the mains that was outside the building!

Gosh. It was a bit funny but I felt so sorry for John. He was also feeling bad and kept apologising to me and Terence and thanked us for the help. Some of the neighbors also showed up to help mop up the water. Finally, when the situation was under control, we left at around 730pm. I got home at around 840pm and finally took off my shoes and socks that were soaked. Despite the mad end to the day, I quite enjoyed my day trip. I'll just remember to wear rubber boots and a raincoat the next time John invites me up to his holiday home again. Phew.

Garfield buddy boy

2010-10-14T14:15:00.000-07:00

Hola everyone!

So you thought I've forgotten about Garfield? NO! Till today, I am very pleased with myself for saving him from being a wandering stray in Saudi Arabia. He's now a well loved, albeit spoilt cat in Singapore. To see how he's doing, check out Celine's post about him in her blog! Garfield's Bath

Isn't he just the cutest?

Adios Amigos!

2010-10-12T12:10:00.000-07:00

Hello everyone!

Today's post is dedicated to the guys whom I worked with in Jeddah. I've worked with many people in my life, but none are quite like this bunch. They came from all walks of life, all sorts of backgrounds. Whether they were victims of circumstance, or just plain adventurous, they all came to make a living.

No where else have I seen a collection of Arabs, Pakistanis, Indians, Sri Lankans, Bangladeshis, Filipinos, Yemeni etc etc working together harmoniously towards a common goal. Ok, harmonious would be really stretching it. More often then not, it was like a cacophonous riot than a melodious harmony. However, we were still a team.

Yes it was a tough and challenging experience for me in Jeddah, and sometimes these guys contributed to the hardships I faced. However, its also these same guys that helped me get through it. I sincerely believe that they were genuinely trying their best despite having daunting limitations due to the infrastructure, the imbecilic authorities or even their personal problems. The fact that they were also in a foreign land, trying to make sense of the madness is not lost on me.

At the end of the day, they came through. Every now and then, they would infuriate me. But they also made me laugh, helped me when I was in need of it and respected me as the manager of the team. I won't forget that. Thanks for the rock and roll amigos!

The "Eh!?!?" Team

The JEDSQ airport team and my successor

The last time I go through this boarding gate

Uno Big Mac Menu por favor

2010-10-02T12:17:00.000-07:00

Hola!

Not bad eh? I can ask for a big mac meal in Spanish! I will not go hungry in Spain!! Or will I?

It all began one sunny afternoon on my second last day in Jeddah. After two years in Saudi Arabia, I managed to accumulate about eight thousand Saudi riyals in cash. With the money tucked neatly into an inconspicuous unlabeled envelope, I asked one of my colleagues to bring me to a money changer in town.

So after bargaining for a good rate and handing over the Riyals in exchange for Euros, I received three crisp 500€ notes, one pristine 100€ note and three 20€ notes. Brilliant!

Fast forward to a week ago. After being in Barcelona for about 2 weeks, my 100€ note and 20€ notes have been used. I was left with the three 500€ notes that I kept in the special compartment in my wallet, always kept safely and close to me as pick pocketing is rampant in Spain. I was hungry. It was lunch time. So what did I do? I popped over to the MacDonalds near my house and keen to order a big mac meal like a local, I said chirpily, " Uno big mac menu por favor? ". That just means one big mac meal please. The girl behind the counter replied with a barrage of Spanish that made no sense to me at all! I was dumbfounded. "UH...."

She then proceeded to point at the options for the meal. Did I want special waffle fries? Or just the normal french fries? Did I want a softdrink, wine or beer? ( Yes you can choose wine or beer for the drink in your meal for the same price!!! Is that fantastic or what?? ) So I nodded like a retard and my patata fritas (french fries) and coca cola ( coca cola ) were keyed in to go along with my big mac. And the damage? 6.15€. Sure thing! So I whipped out my wallet from my super secure storage compartment of my bag and handed over the first of my 500€ notes.

The girl behind the counter froze. She looked like I was trying to rob her. Funny thing was, I wasn't. I was trying to give her money. Not ask for money. Maybe they pay in a different way here in Spain. "No no no no (enter rapid spanish gibberish mambo jambo here)" I didn't have a clue what she was saying. But I had an inkling that it had something to do with my 500€ note. Maybe she didn't have change? At that moment, the manager came out and spoke to me in broken English. She informed me that they were not allowed to take such big notes as 1. they did not have change and 2. they had no way to verify if it was a genuine note.

I was hungry. I had 1500€ in my wallet. But no one would sell me something to eat. Bemused, I left MacDonalds and went home to eat a muesli bar and some fruit.

Going to work the next day, I recounted my experience to my colleagues and they laughed. Apparently, the 500€ is so rare that people rarely see it in day to day transactions. Furthermore, no places would accept this note unless they were selling big ticket items. Such places would usually have some kind of device to check the authenticity of the note. On hind sight, if it were in Singapore, what I did would be like going to MacDonalds for a big mac meal and handing the cashier a 1000 dollar note. Probably wouldn't work back home too huh? Eventually, I went to a bank in the airport and broke the 500€ note into 100s and 50s. I had my big mac meal after that.

Hola! Como ¿Estas?

2010-10-02T11:52:00.000-07:00

Hello everyone!

Yes! I have landed in Barcelona! Ok, I actually landed three weeks ago but its been a crazy three weeks for me. I would've preferred to give you all an update sooner but I've been so busy with work and settling in that I could only really sit down and bang out a blog entry now.

So! Is Barcelona an improvement over Jeddah? CLARO. ( "Claro" means "of course" in Spanish ) Life here is good. The city is beautiful. The people are nice. The scenery is good. The air is fresh. The colors are vibrant. The weather is fantastic. There is a whole section in the supermarket devoted to hams/sausages/bacon. There are women walking around instead of ninjas. I can have a beer with my iberian ham during dinner. Driving is no longer a gamble with the grim reaper. You catch my drift? Life here, is life.

However, not everything is smooth sailing and cheery though. As with life, there will always be issues. I MUST learn how to speak Spanish! Everyone here speaks Spanish ( ahem, you are in Spain Einsten...). I'm facing difficulties with even the most mundane tasks! For example, ordering a big mac meal at MacDonalds or shopping at the supermarket! I'll have to get this sorted soon though coz I cannot imagine trying to explore the place without a basic command of the language.

Also, my apartment isn't really what I expected. Let's just say that this isn't a place I'd willingly rent for myself. I would give you a tour of the place as I did when I first got to Jeddah but then there are 2 rooms that are filled with boxes right now so I will wait for that to be cleared before I take some photos and introduce the apartment to you. However, I am looking to move so maybe you won't get to see this place after all. It all depends on how long it'll take for my resident's permit to be approved. Can't rent a new place without one. Shit. Hmmm, I have to go find out how to say shit in Spanish. My iPhone's Spanish dictionary doesn't list it. Hmph.

Other than that, work has been driving me bonkers. Within a week of my arrival, I had to deal with French air traffic controller strikes and even a Spanish General Strike! Hours and hours of stress and planning. But, by the grace of God, I managed to get through it all. There's still a heap of challenges in store for me but I know that I'll get through it. I always do.

Right, I'll wrap up for now but I will update soon on my adventures in Barcelona! Enjoy your weekend everyone!

Next Chapter

2010-08-21T13:19:00.000-07:00

Hola!

YES! The day that I have been looking forward to since 1 year, 11 months and 24 days ago is finally around the corner. In fact, its so close I can almost smell it. Smells like, wet grass after an afternoon shower. Smells like the morning dew with a glazing of sunrise. Smells like the ocean spray as the waves crash against the rocks. Smells like eggs benedict and a giant glass of mango juice from Panette's. Smells like pesticide.....oh no wait, that's not right. That's just how my house smells now coz the fumigator fella just walked past the porch while blasting the whole place with pest killing white smoke. Now where was I?

Ah right, the bliss of finally being able to leave this place for good. Is it really that bad you ask? No, of course not. This place would be brilliant if you love sand in your underwear, bad smelling people and ultimate frustration. I'd highly recommend it if you enjoy living life to the absolute minimum. No booze, no women, no vice and no entertainment. Every abstaining celibate's wet dream. Here, you can experience total zen and attain a state of nirvana. Of course you don't want to go out and tell anyone that you've attained nirvana or even mention the word "nirvana" coz you'd be stoned to death or beheaded just for mentioning a different religion.

Looking back, I'm pretty amazed at myself for being able to last that long here. Hope is a powerful thing. People used to tell me rubbish like, "oh don't worry, this posting will only be 1 year plus." So after a year, I began wondering when I'd be released. What I wasn't told was that it was gonna be 1 year plus 12 months. Its like running a marathon. You just keep at it till you see the finish line. You might be suffering, in pain and out of breath but you just keep running. Sooner or later, you'll get there.

I did learn a lot from my time here. Not just about the job but also about life. I have a renewed understanding and appreciation for all the blessings I have in my life. Funny how so many people I know are complaining about how crap and shitty their situations are, when they barely even skim the surface of what true misery is. They really need to open their eyes and see beyond their shallow shell of a comfort zone. But I shan't rant about that here. This post is a happy one. This post marks the end of one chapter in my life, and the beginning of another.

Time to move on. This has definitely been a once in a lifetime experience. And once is enough. Ciao~

May the force, find you a new job

2010-06-14T13:52:00.000-07:00

Have you guys ever seen an aircraft marshaler? You know, the fella standing in front of an aircraft on the tarmac, in his day-glo vest and holding two tiny light sabers? He'll be waving the light sabers around to direct the aircraft in to the parking bay. Well, maybe some of you might not have seen such a person before coz in most places, the airports are modern and they have cool high-tech guiding systems to guide the pilots in to park their aircraft. However, the current airport I'm working in was built around the time when man first discovered fire so its pretty much a stoner. Thus my little JEDi aircraft marshaler buddy still has to do his thing in order for the pilots to park here.

Today was no exception. Once the aircraft landed, the JEDi master - let's call him Muthu SkiveWanker, positioned himself with his light sabers. He was all set to guide the aircraft in with the force. The force of pre determined, orchestrated movements of his arms that will tell the pilots when to turn, go straight and finally stop. What a responsibility! And for that few moments, everything depended on him.

So with his flapping arms and swooping gestures illuminated by his 2 red light sabers, it was like watching a weed monkey waving around 2 glowing fire bananas. But today, Muthu SkiveWanker might've been doing his dance a little too enthusiastically. I watched, half in horror and half bemused as one of his light sabers slipped and flew out of his hands! The JEDi master lunged for his fallen light stick but instead of picking it up, his hand grabbed at air as his left foot kicked the light stick further away! But SkiveWanker would not be fazed by this little setback. With a tight roll on the ground, he picked up the light saber and was quick to get back on his feet.

But alas, the recovered light saber seemed to have lost its power! It was no longer illuminated, but not to worry coz the force was strong in this one. As any JEDi master would, Muthu started banging the dead light saber against the palm of his other hand. You know how you always bang the end of a torchlight with weak batteries to try to knock some life into it? He was doing exactly that. Now bearing in mind that his other hand was still holding the second illuminated light stick, I could only imagine what the cockpit crew were seeing from their point of view and what signals and instructions were they receiving? The crazy waves and zig zagging of light from SkiveWanker's actions might've told them to push to full throttle and perform a wheelie, before ending off with a 360 degree doughnut drift into the parking spot. That would've been spectacular, but I'm glad they didn't do it.

So back to Muthu SkiveWanker. He did manage to bring the light saber back to life and quickly returned to his original position to guide the waiting aircraft in. No worries. Just another day in the life of a JEDi.

She said Yes!

2010-05-13T15:46:00.000-07:00

Greetings Y'all!

Now, some of you might already know, I am ENGAGED! No, not in the way where you can't get me on the telephone. Engaged in the way where the love of my life has agreed to marry me! Woooo, marriage. Such a big, grown up word. Shocking how time flies and I have reached the point where I decide to spend the rest of my life with someone special.

The relationship has been fantastic and I knew it was time to take it up a notch. So some time back, I decided that I was gonna propose. However, as with any proposal, I had to go get a nice shiny rock first. Which makes me wonder, who the hell started this tradition of proposing with a diamond anyway? I sure would like to meet him to discuss this trend in a boxing ring.

Anyway traditions aside, I looked around and had my eyes glittered to the point where everything I saw had a fuzzy shimmer. People, cars, birds, the bird shit on my car - all shimmering. But I did find the right stone. Looking at it through a loupe was like being transported into a kaleidoscope of brilliant colors from dispersed light, trapped in crystal. Of course this was no mere crystal, it was a diamond. A precious stoned formed by immense pressure over a long period of time, consisting of a clear and colorless crystalline of pure carbon. The hardest naturally occurring substance in the world. Although, with the astronomical price of the diamond, I wondered if it was even from this world. "You sure its not some alien carbon from Jupiter?" I asked as I handed over my money. Ka-Ching!

Well, I got the diamond set and then kept it nicely in my safe for a while. Then on Celine's birthday, it hit me! It was like an angel was whispering into my ear. Actually it was Garfield meowing at me to feed him even though it wasn't his meal time, but somewhere in my heart, I felt that it was time to propose.

And so after dinner, we went back to her place and just when she was resting her eyes, I whipped out the ring and popped the question. Celine went from droopy eyed sleepy head to wide awake dinner plate eyes. The look of shock and surprise told me that I had caught her off guard. She got over it quickly and ecstatically shouted YES! We must've hugged and laughed for at least 27 mins before she scampered off to tell her family the news. Garfield looked at her ring and then meowed for food. Obviously not a fan of sparkly things.

So that's it. I am engaged to Celine and this is my happy ever after. Just wanted to share this happy moment with you people who read my blog and I hope that sometime soon, I'll be posting pictures of the wedding! So stay tuned, take care and God bless!

Rotten apple

2010-03-04T13:17:00.000-08:00

Ok, I know that lots of people know me to be a huge advocate for apple and the mac, but I'm gonna go ahead and say this. The iPhone sucks. Big time. Apple has made a rotten piece of shit. What the hell were they thinking?

Now before the millions of you out there who are loving your iPhones start spitting and hissing at me, I have to say that I love my iPhone too. But I am just so sorely disappointed and frustrated at it! Its a love/hate relationship and apple should really get a big knock on their heads for screwing this one up. Apple has always come up with great, user-friendly and well thought out products so I wonder why they couldn't do the same with the iPhone.

Let me just state for the record that the iPhone is a fantastic piece of hardware and technology. The gorgeous 3.5 inch screen, the amazing multi-touch interface, fantastic crisp sound and the list goes on. Its no wonder its so desirable and has become a huge money making machine for Apple. But why oh why have they screwed up on some basic fundamental features? Simple things that you'd expect to do on your mobile phone has become a chore on the iPhone. Some are even impossible! Let me list out my main gripes.

1) Ringtones. What is up with the ringtones? Why do I have to use the crappy ringtones that come with the iPhone? They suck. I want to use my own ringtones or mp3s! What's the point of having those amazing little speakers on the phone that blast out clear crisp sounds when we are limited to the crap that's loaded in the iphone? Ok, fine, I know we can purchase custom ringtones from iTunes. Why would I want to spend money on ringtones?? Ok, I know I can make my own ringtones from my collection of mp3s, but its a troublesome and tedious process and I AM LIMITED TO 30 seconds for my ringtone?!? So say I have this fantastic tune from coldplay that I want to use as my ringtone. Previously, all I had to do in my sony ericsson was load the mp3 in the phone and then select it as a ring tone. I could listen to the entire song play out as I make the caller wait for me to pick up. Now with the iPhone, I have to choose which 30sec portion of the song is my favorite, convert that 30 second portion into a ringtone and then load it into the iPhone. 30 seconds!! Crap.

2) Alarm. Ok, the alarm gripe is pretty much the same as the ringtone problem. Coz the sounds for the alarm come from the same list as the ringtones. Again, I WANT TO USE MY OWN SOUND FOR MY ALARM!

3) Bluetooth. This technology known as bluetooth is really a marvel. Wireless data transmission. Fantastic. With my sony ericsson, I could use it to zap data (pictures, sounds, contacts etc..) to other phones or to my computer. I could also use it as a remote control if I wanted. And of course it works great for my bluetooth earpiece when I'm driving. With the iPhone, all its bluetooth can do is connect with a bluetooth headset. Nothing else. What the hell? Did apple just put in this amazing cutting edge technology, only to dumb it down to one function?? How stupid is that?

4) Battery life. What good would a smartphone be if it were dead all the time? The battery can barely last a day! How efficient and productive will you be when all you're doing all day is trying to find a power outlet or USB port to charge your iPhone? Scrolling through my contact list....*blip* it dies. Sending an email.....*blip* it dies. Surfing the internet to see where I can buy a new phone that works....*blip* it dies. You get the idea.

5) Data connections. Wow! The iPhone comes with 3G, EDGE and GPRS to ensure that you're always connected for data! Well, what if I DON'T WANT to be connected? What if I don't like paying for unknown usage of data?? when I click on "turn off 3G" it automatically jumps to EDGE or GPRS. Why aren't there options to turn off EDGE and GPRS as well? This sneaky iPhone is always sending and receiving data somehow. Its like some kind of secret spy sending out info about where I am and what I'm doing. I want to be able to shut down the data connections! Again, there are ways. But why can't apple just make it simple?

Now I ask myself, why. Why did I decide to swap away my slim and simple sony ericsson that just works, for this bulky heavy brick that infuriates me? WHY?

The airline from hell

2010-02-02T10:19:00.000-08:00

I had the unfortunate predicament of having to take an SV (saudi arabian airlines) flight from Riyadh to Jeddah recently. I won't go into the details of how that came to be, but just know that this short one hour and twenty minute flight was the worst one hour and twenty minutes in my entire flying life.

Let's begin with the check-in at Riyadh airport. I joined the line and when it came to my turn, I gave the check-in agent my passport. "No passport. Domestic flight" grunted the guy behind the counter. Oh! Silly me! My bad. So I proceeded to inform him of my flight number and I gave him my family name (the passport would help to show my details wouldn't it?) "Give me ticket" Ticket?! Wait a minute, its an E-Ticket and as far as I know, E-Tickets are electronically stored in the system and required no physical ticket. Hence the name E-Ticket. I told him it was an E Ticket and therefore I had no ticket to show him. He gave me a frustrated look and waved me aside. I was flabbergasted. Thats it? I'm out? I'm not gonna fly? I hurriedly whipped out my laptop (OH I HATE MY COMPANY LAPTOP AND I HATE WINDOWS), turned it on at the counter and dug out the email that had the E-Ticket confirmation and number in it. With that, the guy finally stopped using his fingers to pick his nose and proceeded to type some entries on the keyboard. Mental note to self - never touch the keyboards at the check-in counters. Finally, the check-in agent handed me a flimsy boarding pass and grunted for the next guy in line to step up.

Right, moving on. I headed to the boarding gates and realised that the boarding gate number was printed in arabic on my boarding pass. Good thing I could read arabic numerals. Not very good for people who don't read arabic huh? "Excuse me, can you tell me what gate my flight is departing from?" asked a chinese guy in a suit. I glanced at his boarding pass and noticed he was on the same flight as me. "gate 36 buddy" I replied. Why would he ask me though? Did I look like I could read arabic?

About 15 minutes later, the flight started boarding at gate 36 and the announcer went on and on in arabic. His announcement must have went on for a good 12 minutes at least. I wonder what he was saying? I hope its not about a delay or something? Finally he grunted "SV1069 now boarding at gate 36." And that was it. Are you sure you're not hiding something from me?

After getting nudged around by saudis rushing to board the aircraft, I found my seat and settled in. The aircraft was configured in a 2-5-2 seating arrangement. Guess which seat I got? The ogre at the check-in counter had put me right smack in the center seat in the center block. Yes, the 3rd seat in the 5 seat section. Bloody punk. Sigh, its just a one hour twenty minute flight, how bad can it be right? That positive thought went up in smoke the moment two obese saudis squeezed in on either side of me. How the hell they fitted their gargantuan asses in the seats eludes me. I was miserable. How the hell do you get so fat in the desert in the first place?

The aircraft shudders and soon we're airborne. Surprisingly enough, the cabin crew roll out the meal carts. I didn't think there'd be a meal service on such a short sector. I wonder what's for supper? "Lamb or fish?" I hear the stewardess call out as she goes row by row handing out trays of food. I thought to myself, hmmm I'll have the fish. Fish has always been the safer choice in my experience. When it came to my row, I was all prepared to say "FISH!" but the stewardess didn't ask me if I wanted lamb or fish, she just handed me a tray. You don't have to be Einstein to know why. They've run out of choices. What luck. I gingerly peeled open the foil and how LUCKY! it was lamb. Argh. Well, not actually lamb as it turns out coz when I bit into it, I realised that it was really bits of rubber tyre from a cement mixer truck. Eating the rice that accompanied the rubber was like eating bits of plastic shavings. I decided not to try the peas. On my left and right, Al Obeseo and Gigantor were guzzling the industrial waste of a meal down their throats. Do they even chew? They gave me a horrified look when the stewardess cleared my untouched tray of food. Another stewardess was walking down the other aisle saying "coffee tea?" Although, she wasn't really saying it to anyone. Rather, what she was doing was walking quickly while holding a pot in each hand and saying "coffee tea?" to the space above our heads. Her blank look and hurried steps prevented anyone from getting any coffee or tea. I even saw one passenger waving his cup and trying to grab her arm but to no avail.

Suddenly, the captain comes over the PA system and goes on and on in arabic. No one seemed to be paying attention but then he spoke in English and said, "We are starting our descent into Jeddah" That was music to my ears! The nightmare will be over soon! The cabin crew cleared up all the trays and were soon strapped in for the landing. I nearly wanted to punch my hands in the air and scream Hallelujah when the aircraft touched down on the tarmac and rolled to a stop at the parking bay. I would be out of this shit hole soon!

I disembarked the aircraft and was soon exiting the JED airport. I had made it.

So to conclude, if someone came up to me and said, "Hey Darren, here's a free ticket to go fly on SV!", I would kick that guy in the guts and pound him into the ground. Never. I would rather fall down a flight of steps. Head first. While chewing a mouthful of rusted nails. With durians stuffed under my clothes. And wearing inline skates. Period.

Garfield is in Singapore

2010-01-05T10:23:00.000-08:00

I did it! I have successfully orchestrated the migration of our furry little friend, Garfield, to Singapore! Despite all the messy applications and payments and permits, I managed to wrangle everything into place and fly Garfield to Singapore. I have rescued him from being a stray in this shitty place! Unfortunately, poor little Garfield is stuck in quarantine right now. He's gotta do 30 days of time in a little room the size of a toilet cubicle. I hope he'll enjoy living with Celine in Singapore and won't mind the humidity when he gets out.

Well, after a week in Singapore, I'm now back in Jeddah again and suddenly the house here feels so empty and cold without Garfield. I didn't think I would miss him that much but I do! No furball meowing to be fed or rubbing himself against my legs while I blog. No snoozy cat warming my stomach as I watch movies on my computer. I actually miss patting his little fuzzy head as he head butts my hand in acknowledgement.

I hope he's doing alright in his quarantine room. I sure miss him now that I'm back in Jeddah, but I'm glad I've rescued him and will be able to give him a good life from now on. Can't wait to see him again and collect him from the quarantine centre to bring him home. In the mean time, here's what I'm using to bring a little Garfield into my life in Jeddah.

Garfield Vs Vader

2009-12-26T10:08:00.000-08:00

Hummmm

2009-12-24T14:01:00.000-08:00

Are you a fan of shooting hoops and slam dunks? Does basketball course through your veins and in your blood? Do you dream of bashing through wild roads in a macho muscle 4WD machine to get to your favorite bball court? WELL LOOK NO FURTHER coz cult basketball shoes and apparel maker AND1 has teamed up with Hummer to release the limited edition HUMMER H1AND1!

AND1 needs no introduction as a premier brand for basketball shoes and apparel. Famous for decking out athletes with a particular prowess for basketball finesse, they have gone one step further by collaborating with Hummer's popular 4WD vehicle - the H1, to add some fuel guzzling power and creating the ultimate basketball bling machine - the H1AND1.

Show up in one of these babies at your next match and you can be assured that your opponents will go limp and feverish at the sheer sight of its power. Even your fans will cough and gasp in adoration, as if the wind has been sucked out of their lungs. The cheers and screams that you will receive will definitely cause sore throats later and some fans have even been known to suffer from chills, headaches and fatigue just by being near the H1and1. You'll easily crush your opponents as they collapse with respiratory problems.

If Arnold Schwarzenegger had the H1and1 when filming terminator, he'll be saying "I'll be back......with my H1and1 so prepare to die from respiratory failure and high fever". Potent stuff. So what are you waiting for! Go visit your nearest Hummer dealer today and get some H1and1! *Made in Mexico.

Resident Evil Airport

2009-12-20T04:44:00.000-08:00

I could hear my heart pounding in my chest. Did I dare venture out of my office? I knew I had to, it was my responsibility to know what was going on before I could plan my next move. Gingerly, I twisted the door knob and stepped quietly into the corridor, my eyes darting left and right to make sure I was safe.

There was a putrid smell in the air. The walls of the corridor were stained with all sorts of filth imaginable. I looked around in the dimly lit corridor to survey the evidence of the mayhem that was in progress. I took quick short breathes to try to calm myself down but the flickering fluorescent tubes were playing on my nerves. Some parts of the corridor were not even lit. I made my way to the staircase and slowly descended, into what seemed like hell.

The whole terminal was swarming with them. They looked vaguely human. With their hollow eyes and discolored teeth, they drag their scrawny frames along in an uncoordinated and zombie-ish movement. Their slimy, skeletal hands clawing at whatever they can grab on to. But its not the way that these "living-dead" moved that was eerie, it was the sounds. The guttural groans and moans that drone out from them could chill you to the bone. The screams of their victims add to the horror that was being played out right in front of my eyes.

I could not stay there for too long. I had to keep moving fast to prevent them from getting me. I dashed out from the stairwell and made a break for the abandoned cafeteria. I could hide from view for a few seconds behind the counter to decide where I could run to next. "Gak...Groagh!" I narrowly missed getting puked on as I athletically leapt over the counter. The disgusting things will spew crap at you from their mouths in a half cough half vomit motion. Best to stay out of reach from that. I tumbled out from my hiding place and scampered for the entrance to the check-in hall. I could see four to five of the monstrosities crouched over a limp man in uniform. He was slumped over and I could barely make out the immigrations uniform before it was all ripped to bits. Nothing could save that man now. I pressed on.

Carefully avoiding the broken glass and ripped luggage bags with their contents strewn all over, I finally arrived to the checkpoint where the security would normally screen passengers and bags. The area was abandoned and I could see the sparks spewing from the trashed X ray machine. There were bits of organic looking lumps splattered all over, whether they used to be human or not I could not tell. What I did know was that the sterile area was breached. The entire terminal had fallen and I no longer knew if my team or even the security personnel were alive. It was hopeless.

Flinging a metal chair at the moaning zombie crawling towards me on my right, I decided that continuing any further would be pointless. I had to find an alternate solution, but more importantly, I had to stay alive and being out here was not helping me at all. In frustration, I smashed another metal chair on the same zombie's face and jumped over it to head back to the safety of my office. I sprinted all the way back to the staircase and up to my office without looking back.

Slamming the door shut, I was about to topple a heavy shelf at the door to barricade it when the door swung open! Was I too slow? I grabbed the nearest chair and was about to use all my might to fling it at whatever was coming through the door when I saw that it was one of my staff!! He was alive!!!

"Boss, aircraft off chocks at 2045. On time."

Great! All is well then. I then proceeded to pack up my bag to head home after another long day at work.

Sleep like an Egyptian

2009-12-08T12:14:00.000-08:00

I always knew Garfield had a royal air about him.

D&G

2009-12-05T12:52:00.000-08:00

I've been asked time again, what's living with Garfield like? Well, despite all the little complaints I've been posting in this blog about him, he's actually a very lovable and good natured cat. He's well mannered and he doesn't do nightmarish things as described by other cat owners. He pees and poos where he's supposed to and he's always warming my stomach when I'm watching movies.

In fact, I reckon if there's any complaining to be done, it should be by Garfield about me. I'm always listening to music or watching movies at my computer way past his bed time. All the lights are switched on and the sub woofer is always booming. Hardly a conducive environment to snooze. Poor little Garfield has to endure my noise.

Garfield is also a very smart cat. I just found out the other day that he's been using my mac when I'm out at work! He even created a facebook account for himself. Sneaky fella.

All in all, I'm glad I've got him for company here. He's definitely broken the monotony of life in Jeddah. I hope you guys get to meet Garfield one day. I'm sure you guys will love him too. I'll end off here and leave you with a picture of Garfield and I.

A more useful Garfield

2009-11-25T13:48:00.000-08:00

This fatty bom bom Garfield is such a lazy bones! All he does is eat and sleep and lounge around all day!

I've had enough! I decided I'd make him more useful around the house so after some tinkering, I now present to you : Garfield Tissue Box Holder!

He doesn't move around much anymore. Maybe he needed all his insides to work properly huh? hmmmm....

Rained in!

2009-11-25T12:56:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, it rains in the desert. Very rare, but it happens. In fact, its just once a year I hear. It rained this morning and if you go back to one of my older blog entries, you'll realise that it was roughly about the same time last year that I experienced rain for the first time in this dust bowl.

This time was slightly different though. Instead of a shower for 30 mins or so, it rained for 4 hours. By this country's standards, thats like rain for 40 days and 40 nights straight. Of course, the brilliant town planners, civil engineers and infrastructure builders had all of this well thought out so naturally everything was flooded. Drainage? What is this thing you call drainage? Insha-allah I go pray. It was a bloody catastrophe.

There was water everywhere! Roads were flooded. Pavements were submerged. I could not even get out of my own driveway! I was rained in. Looking out of my window, you'd think I was living in some luxurious water front villa. No, make that a swamp front slum.

I'd probably need a canoe if I wanted to get out of the house at all. Of course I didn't have a canoe. Who the hell would own a canoe in the middle of a desert? I decided to venture out to have a look to see if there was any hope of the water residing so that I could get to work on time. But before I could even step out of my driveway, I heard a gurgling sound and saw something struggling in the water in front of me. What could it be? I quickly waded over and reached out to grab what looked like a little hand! And goodness I was aghast at what I saw. It was.........crap what do you call them? It was one of those........urmmmm......It was an arab child. *shudder* I cannot believe I actually touched it. Plonk! I dropped it back and returned to my house to wash my hands.

broken teacup

2009-11-14T12:08:00.000-08:00

Noooooooooo! I broke my teacup! My nice, so simple its cool teacup! This is a catastrophe!!! Sigh....

Ok so its just a teacup. But I hate it when I break something that makes me happy. I love tea and drinking tea from that teacup makes me happy. Some of you might know it. Its the clear glass mug from muji. It slipped from my soapy hands while I was doing the dishes and in slo mo I watched it fall from my hands to the bottom of the sink. It wasn't even a great height but it was enough. With a sickening clang I saw crack lines appear all over the side of the mug. My shrill scream might've caused a few more cracks but it was a goner anyway.

Sickening. Why did they make the glass so brittle anyway? It must be a ploy to get us, gullible consumers, to keep going back to buy more. This is the second one I've owned that's broken by the way. The first one was broken by my housekeeper. You know what I think? They should make 'em with bullet proof glass. Yes! The kind that is used for the car windows on the vehicles of various leaders around the world. Now that would be a good cup.

I could enjoy my tea right in the middle of a gun battle and not worry that my cup would shatter! badabada bang! KA-PWING! KA-PWING! *sips tea* HA! Eat that osama!

Of course, why anyone would choose to sit in the middle of a gun fight sipping tea is beyond me. But thats besides the point. I am vexed at the loss of my teacup. Now I've gotta wait to return to Singapore before I can make my way to Muji to buy another. Maybe I should bubble wrap my next one before I use it. Brilliant.

Spell Czech

2009-09-20T06:48:00.000-07:00

Eye love my pea see. Eat calms with many spelling chequers. Ass eye type out my ant trees, eat will clearly marque four my revue duh miss steaks eye kin knot sea oar mist out. Ass soon ass a mist ache is maid, it nose and will in form me so that eye can put duh error rite. Fan test tick.

Garfield

2009-09-13T12:19:00.000-07:00

Greetings everyone! As some of you might already know, I've recently adopted a cat here. This little fella started showing up a few weeks ago at my porch. He would always be sitting or lounging around the door when I came back from my swims or runs. I thought he was kinda cute and since he was so friendly, I'd invite him in and give him some food.

Meet Garfield. He's an orange ball of fur with a bushy tail. Since I decided that he could come live with me, we had to do something about his hygiene and health. I personally gave him a bath and promptly sent him to the vet to be groomed and vaccinated. Then I realised something. Garfield is the laziest cat in the world! Ok thats nothing surprising right? Cats have been known to be lazy creatures that enjoy lounging around. But Garfield has a gift. You give him the right sofa to be lazy in and he'll provide all the entertainment you could ask for. For example:

This is how he sleeps normally

This is how he sleeps when he wants to have a different perspective of the world

This is him pretending to be superman

And then there's Garfield pretending to be road kill

Sometimes, he tries to camouflage himself and pretends to be a misplaced feather duster

Even though we've only spent like a week together, we've already developed a pretty good understanding of each other. Garfield knows what time I usually get up and will start meowing for his breakfast around then. He also has a certain style of meowing to indicate to me that he's hungry. Of course, standing next to his food dish gives me a good hint too. He also knows how to show that he's thirsty

Not all has been smooth sailing though and we have had our little arguments. When I refuse to give him any more food or buy him the latest cat toy, he'll sulk and try to be funny by sitting on his sofa facing the wrong direction, refusing to look at me.

Garfield is also a silent killer. He will stealthily sneak up behind you and then let a fart go. And I tell you, his farts are phenomenal stink bombs! And worse of all, they have no sound! By the time you realise, its too late and he'd be sniggering somewhere far away or acting blur (even though there's only 2 of us in the house). Of course I couldn't take this lying down so I got my revenge after dinner one night. 2 cans of coke plus some mutton curry is a great combi to churn up some gastronomical gases. When the time was right, I ran straight up to him and pointed my ass in his face. Before he could realise what I was up to, I let a big one rip.

That sure knocked him out good for a while. But despite all this, we're still the best of friends and he's still as affectionate as ever. Garfield is always following me around the house and wanting to sit on my lap. Even though I've always thought of myself as more of a dog person, this little feline has managed to warm its way into my heart. The only thing that pains me now is how the story will end when I get posted to another station...

Happy anniversary

2009-09-03T13:51:00.000-07:00

28 August 2008, the day I arrived to Jeddah. Here I am now, a year later. Still alive, still ploughing on.

I guess you can actually survive here. However, it is tough and nearly impossible if not for the bi-monthly trips home to recharge and maintain my sanity. After spending so much time here, have I learnt to get by? Yes. Get used to this place and understand it? No.

In this world where normal rules do not apply, things still happen that make me take a step back to ponder why some of these people can be so rude, stubborn and thick headed. Other times I take a step back and wonder, why do you have to stand so close to me when you talk? Your breath stinks. You smell like a cow. And no, I do not want to shake your grimy hands. Bugger off.

But its not all bad. With the lack of anything else to do, I find that I exercise more regularly. I also eat healthily (read: bland home cooked food). So at least there is some good coming from this. I think I might also have learnt to be a more patient person. In fact, I've learnt to take things easy and not expect the stressful and brutal efficiency of home. You can't expect a donkey to gallop like a race horse can you?

In the midst of all this, I have also been able to make a new friend! Garfield. Garfield started showing up at my door a few weeks ago. It would always be sitting around my porch when I came back from my run/swim. It seemed to know when I would be back. I don't know why it decided to hang around but it always looked like it wanted to come in. I've decided to buy some cat food so that I can give Garfield a snack whenever it visits. Most of the time it's just happy to sit around and lounge though.

So here I am. Out of place, but exactly where I have to be. Hope there'll be some light at the end of this tunnel. Take care y'all.

Low gear

2009-08-07T15:27:00.000-07:00

Blimey! I cannot believe it! Another season of top gear has ended! Only 7 episodes those lazy bums. After an endless wait, they come around and show us 7 episodes of crazy cars and mad adventures and then they vanish?!? Sigh. Sure puts me in a dull mood. Not much left to look forward to as the weeks go by is there?

Then again, I guess this downward spiral into the doom and gloom of being here really begins the moment I step on that aeroplane bound for this hot and dusty wasteland doesn't it? Honestly, ignorance is truly bliss.

The moment I get on board, a nice stewardess will offer me a drink. Usually its champagne but seeing how my system seems to have developed a flea sized tolerance for the bubbly, I opt for some pineapple juice with soda water instead. Then I wonder to myself, should I ask for a beer? I won't get beer in Jeddah. Not the real ones. They have some alcohol free beer crap that even comes in apple or peach flavor. The dim wits are calling these malt/apple/peach sodas "beer"!! Shocking.

But before my internal debate about the beer can finish, another nice stewardess will bring round some magazines and I always help myself to the same few. T3, Top gear magazine, Lux and the national geographic.

Flipping through T3, I will see all the latest gadgets and amazing soon-to-be-released gizmos that would keep me occupied for a while and in some hi-tech way, make my life easier. The latest mobile device that will allow me to watch videos while calling a friend, with one finger typing out an SMS and another finger browsing the world wide web, all while shuffling through my photo collection just by giving the device a slight flick. Or amazing new sunglasses made out of some exotic material from jupiter. Not to forget the 127783 new products from apple that will be launched in 2010. the list goes on and on. Of course this makes me a little bit depressed. Why? BECAUSE I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO SEE OR BUY THESE THINGS WHEN THEY ARE RELEASED COZ BY THE TIME THEY REACH THIS SHIT HOLE, PEOPLE WILL BE TELEPORTING THEMSELVES TO SATURN IN THE YEAR 2140. Wow! see that? I just prophesied that teleportation will be available in 2140.

Anyway, so I'll chuck the T3 mag grumpily and pick up topgear. Good magazine. Nice glossy pictures of fantastic cars with in depth reviews and technical specs. Usually cars that have at least 300 horses and go from 0-100 in less than 5 seconds. Cars that I WON'T GET TO BUY OR DRIVE WHILE I'M HERE COZ ALL I GET IS A TIN CAN HONDA! Sigh.

Toss the topgear mag and move on to Lux magazine. This one's the killer. tempting me with all the beautiful houses and boats and watches and suits. Usually by this point I would go nuts.

But you know what? If I hadn't known any of these gadgets existed. Or that Ferrari was releasing a new replacement for the 430. Or that Breguet was reintroducing a new remake of a beautiful classic watch. I wouldn't be feeling this way. I'd be happy. Happy that I've got a job. Happy that I've got a home. Happy and contented. So next time, I'm not gonna read anymore magazines or go poke around on the world wide marketing web. Ignorance, is bliss.

nothing else compares

2009-07-29T13:03:00.000-07:00

Wow! I am actually home pretty early tonight! This rarely happens on a flight day for me. Why? A smooth day at work here is a myth. There is no such thing. You'd have a higher chance of finding the loch ness monster doing the breast stroke in the waters of the bermuda triangle. Yet somehow, here I am, sitting at my computer banging out a new blog post.

The check-in and boarding today went pretty smooth. Of course we'd get the usual bunch of morons who would refuse to queue and walk straight to the front and demand to be checked in. Good thing I've got my trusty big burly bouncer style security guy who is always willing to help me out coz I occasionally give him some ice cream. Bozo (yes his name is really Bozo!) will just come up and point out where the queue starts and that usually solves the problem. One of the numbskulls who refused to queue made a big fuss and started shouting at the counters but finally relented when he realised everyone was staring at him. He went to the back of the queue grudgingly and guess what? When it got to his turn, he realised that he had been queuing at the wrong airline's counters! He walked away angry and red faced to the accompanying chorus of synchronised laughter from all of us. "Ahem! ready guys? Ha Ha Ha Ha HA Ha ha. Ok enough, get back to work." Airline-1 Moron-0.

Boarding was pretty smooth too. Non of the usual drama of passengers playing hide and seek, getting lost in the departure gate's 3 cubicle toilet, falling asleep under the benches, talking to a wrong number on the phone etc etc.... Of course, something had to screw up right? I mean, this is Jeddah! After all the passengers had boarded and all the doors were closed, we were waiting for the pilots to get clearance and push the aircraft back. The ground engineer was standing there with his headphones on, looking pleased that the boarding had finished 15 minutes before the departure time. I was pretty pleased myself. "What a great night!" I thought to myself as I looked up at the black arabian sky when a flutter of frantic movements caught my eye. The captain was waving at me from the cockpit, as if trying to tell me something. I looked at the ground engineer and he was still smiling to himself as if his wife had cooked the best curry in the world earlier in the afternoon for lunch.

"What is the captain trying to say? Is he not talking through your headphones?" The engineer looked puzzled and tapped his headphones. "No sir?" He replied and proceeded to check the jack that was plugged in to the communication port. It wasn't plugged in. "oh sorry sir, its not plugged in"

The pilots could've pushed back ages ago. If only the engineer had plugged in his headphones properly, heard the command and told the tow truck to move. No matter, we still had 10 minutes to spare so the flight went off early still. So thats that. Another day, another dollar. If only every flight were so easy. I wonder what's in store for me tomorrow?

Save the Sharks, save the world

2009-06-11T12:30:00.000-07:00

Before you dive into your next bowl of shark's fin soup, think about this. That ridiculously priced asian delicacy of a few tasteless strands of fibre from a shark's fin, cooked in a starchy broth that has a total nutrition value equivalent to a flea, is contributing to the end of the world. Not to mention how low a form of human being you are reducing yourself to by condoning and supporting such a barbaric and cruel industry.

The Shark finning industry is a multi billion dollar industry that is single handedly wiping out the shark population on our planet. Sharks have managed to survive on earth for more than 400 million years. They have always been the guardians of the oceans, regulating the earth's eco-system and helping to maintain a balance in nature. They have survived through the various extinction events that happened throughout the earth's life span, which have wiped out many other species. However, even the sharks might not stand a chance against the worst catastrophe ever to affect the earth. Homo-sapiens.

How can killing off the sharks end the world? Well, its simple really. All living things need oxygen to survive and while you might think that we get all the oxygen we need from the trees and vegetation around us, you're wrong. More than half of the earth's oxygen supply comes from the ocean. More specifically, they come from organisms called phytoplankton that live in the seas and oceans that make up 72% of the earth's surface. These microscopic organisms are also the main food source for a plethora of marine creatures. From fishes that are smaller than your fingertip to the majestic Baleen whale, they all feed on plankton. Now if unchecked, the fishes are gonna eat up all the plankton and our oxygen would be seriously depleted. Our atmosphere would then get more and more saturated with carbon dioxide. Combine that with the other crap that the humans are doing on earth and we're looking at a vicious cycle that starts with global warming and ultimately, the destruction of the planet.

phytoplankton - sustaining life and the planet

Here's where the sharks come in. I'm pretty sure God designed them as a safety system to keep nature in balance. These supreme predators are right at the top of the food chain. They make sure that the life in the ocean is regulated so that there is enough phytoplankton to keep the earth running. Sharks themselves do not get to run amok and over populate. Sharks only reach sexual maturity after 15 yrs and live up to 30-35yrs on the average. Everything was balanced, until we came along.

Now sharks have been hunted to the brink of extinction. The way that they are hunted is cruel and barbaric as well. After getting snared by long baited hooks strung on lines that stretch for kilometers at a time, they are either hauled up or left to suffocate. When the fishermen come around and reel in the lines, the fins of the sharks are hacked off and the finless bodies are thrown back into the water. More often then not, the sharks are still alive as they sink to the bottom of the ocean awaiting a slow and painful death. Imagine having your arms and legs hacked off and then getting thrown into the ocean.

And here's the really appalling part. The scum who hunts sharks will sell the fins to buyers for about a dollar a kilo. The fins will pass through many middlemen and change hands until it reaches your table, where it will cost up to two hundred dollars for a bowl of shark's fin soup. What kind of a monumental moron would you be to pay so much for something that would've cost less than a roll of toilet paper. And by supporting such a demand, you are basically lowering yourself to the same level as the scum who brutally ended the lives of these majestic and beautiful creatures for a quick buck.

Look, my words and pictures here can only say so much. To get the full story and a better idea of what is going on out there, watch the documentary sharkwater (get the DVD or check out youtube) or visit sharkwater.com. And for heaven's sake, say no to shark's fin and lets help bring this industry to an end. Oh and did I mention you'd be saving the planet too?

The power of Menektism

2009-04-12T09:40:00.000-07:00

Every now and then, someone will ask me with a puzzled look, "what did you just call your girlfriend?" Well, I called her Menek. We all give endearing nicknames to our loved ones and for Celine, I call her Menek. What exactly is Menek? Well, if you've lived in Singapore long enough and are exposed to the lazy drawly Singaporean way of articulating the English language, you'll come across the evolution of the word "magnet". Menek.

To fully understand the concept, we have to go back to the basics. What is a magnet?

mag⋅net[mag-nit]
–noun
1. a body, as a piece of iron or steel, that possesses the property of attracting certain substances, as iron.
2. a lodestone.
3. a thing or person that attracts: The park was a magnet for couples and families.

So basically, a magnet attracts! I am definitely very attracted to Celine. Thats why she's my girlfriend. But thats not the main reason why I call her Menek. I call Celine Menek coz she's always gravitating to me. During my time in Melbourne, whenever I came home from work, she would be flying from the opposite end of the living room towards me for a bear hug when I've barely stepped in the apartment. When we're walking next to each other while out shopping or strolling, she would constantly bump into me and sometimes get stuck to me and we end up walking like conjoined twins. While watching a movie on the sofa or in a cinema, she would constantly be squeezing closer and closer till we would both fit in one seat. But the ultimate magnetic skill that Celine has is when we turn in for the night.

I've got a big king sized bed and I sleep on one side, while Celine sleeps on the other. Lots of space for the both of us. But somehow, along the course of the night, Celine would somehow creep over to my side slowly. She'd do it in her sleep and before you know it, she'd be right smack next to me and stuck to me like glue. I'd wake up the next morning all squeezed to the edge with her imprint either on my tummy or my back depending which way I was laying. I've prepared a little diagram to illustrate.

So there you have it. Thats how Celine got her nickname Menek. And I love the way she's always stuck to me, like a magnet that never fades.

Amber and me

2009-03-28T14:56:00.000-07:00

So its another off-day gone by in Jeddah and as usual I've watched some movies on the computer to pass the time and stay sane. Today it was Marley and me. The show made me tear, and I normally don't cry at the movies. The world's worst dog but in actual fact the greatest dog huh? Hahaha, sounds very much like Amber when I had her. Amber was a siberian husky that was part of my family for about 2 years.

She was the most beautiful dog I had ever seen. Piercing white eyes. A proud and commanding stance. A big bushy tail that curled up against her back. And she had natural eyeliner too! Amber was always a curious dog who loved exploring and would bolt for the main gate whenever it opened. That was why we always had to keep her on a leash in the day time, until my dad decided to build an inner gate that closed up the side of my house for her to roam free.

Amber also had a really cool personality. She was friendly and would come over to say hi to everyone who looked in her direction. But she never barks. Even when we went for our walks and the other dogs in the neighborhood went berserk, creating a cacophony of deafening barking and screeching, Amber would be as cool as a cucumber. She'd just look around and wonder what the commotion was about, her head and tail always held high with confidence. In fact, the only noises she made were a short bark when she wanted some attention and a hilarious "singing"/howling sound when she's upset. There's even a name given to this funny whiney howl - ululation. Some call it yowling. And the two things that made her upset? Thunder and a ringing phone.

She would howl and tremble whenever there was lightning and thunder. Times like these we would let her into the house to sleep and sometimes when I came home late on a stormy night, I would just sit down next to her and tell her its alright and then rub her tummy till she fell asleep. In the day time if the phone rang and no one answered, she would run around the house yowling as if trying to tell us that someone had better pick up the phone if not she would pull it right out of the socket.

Amber had tremendous strength. I remember the time when I leashed her to a big sturdy bench in my garden while I prepared to go for a run. The main gate was open and this cat had the guts to stroll slowly across the open driveway. The moment Amber set her eyes on the cat, all hell broke loose. She bolted and took the entire bench along with her. The dragging bench tore out a trail of grass and soil in the garden as Amber tried to pounce on the cat. I was tying my shoe laces and was almost knocked out by the flying bench. The cat let out a screech and ran off. I never saw the cat again.

Even Celine would get exhausted holding on to Amber's leash when we took her out for walks. I would be so amused at how Amber was pulling Celine around, rather than Celine leading her where we were supposed to go. I'm glad Amber got to meet my darling Celine. They got along so well that when I came back from Melbourne each time, I could've sworn that Amber was more happy to see Celine than she was to see me!

And the highlight of Amber's evenings? Our runs together. We would go for long runs from my house, to the SIA training center and then round the Singapore expo before coming back. It was like an adventure for her and she would run along next to me without ever breaking a sweat. Pedestrians along the walkways would sometimes get freaked out at the sight of man and dog charging towards them. I used to enjoy seeing the terror in their eyes before they jumped off the pavement and into the grass. After the run we would sit next to each other in the garden to watch the birds fly by. Another thing she loved was her chew toy. This pink colored dolphin that she would chew up and invite us to try to pull and pry from her jaws of steel. Sometimes we could get it out, but only with a lot of cunning and trickery.

Yes, I've written everything in past tense. Thats because she is no longer with us. My beautiful dog was hit by a car a year ago. Right around the end of March in 2008. Her energy and adventurous spirit got the better of her and she bolted out of the house one morning when the maid forgot to latch the inner gate. I didn't even get to say goodbye as I was in Melbourne at that time. It was very difficult for me. Now that I think of it, its quite a coincidence that I decided to watch Marley and me today, and be reminded of Amber. Its the anniversary of her passing. She's gone to a better place now, where she has endless open fields to run, play and explore.

I miss you Amber. And I hope to see you again one day. You really were the world's greatest dog to me. Rest in peace my dear, dear friend.

somebody call 911!

2009-03-19T13:53:00.000-07:00

I watch a lot of TV serials. Every week, my life revolves around a few episodes of TV shows that I download off the internet. Its one of the few things that help me move time along as I count the days before I get my next station. I also seem to be particularly drawn to medical dramas. I really enjoy watching grey's anatomy, house and private practice. But there's something that I've noticed from watching these shows that really bugs me. Why in the world does someone always rush and bend over the person who's collapsed or injured and then yell "Somebody call 911!"

Do it yourself you dim wit. The 3 seconds that you wasted yelling that out might be the crucial 3 seconds the patient needs to stay alive. The next 3 minutes of confusion from the people registering that urgent cry and wondering who should be calling is enough to seal the fate of the poor person sprawled on the ground. Duh.

Ok, I'm just bored and grumpy that I've watched my week's supply of shows and need to wait for the next batch to download. Somebody save me!

The most stressful night ever

2009-03-03T12:31:00.000-08:00

I hosted a buffet dinner last night. It was an annual event for my ground handling agents. It went well and everyone went home happy. Except me. While making my way home from the remote location of the chalet, I GOT LOST! The road I was on suddenly forked into 2 different directions without me knowing and of course, I was on the wrong one. Damn the dark roads and crappy road signs!

There were no immediate U turns as it was a freeway and none of the exit road names were familiar to me. I had no bloody idea where I was heading! Why did this have to happen to me?? And why are all the road signs in arabic and not illuminated?! Driving along in my car, I was very anxious and very stressed. My stomach felt like it was rearranging itself in figure-of-eight knots. My chest was tight and I couldn't breathe properly. I was really in the shits then. Visions of a rusted out honda civic with a skeleton still grabbing the steering wheel tightly in the middle of the desert floated in my head. NOOOOoooooooo!

So what did I do? Pray of course! I prayed and prayed and prayed and asked God to save me. Gosh I must've been chattering like a monkey on steroids. The next thing I knew, there was a blinding white flash and BAM! my car landed in my driveway! Ok actually no, but how cool would it be if it did happen that way huh? What really happened was I decided to get off the freeway and turned off at the next exit. I drove anxiously for a while more along "Al-Badouin Mohammmed dunno what sandy armpits mussi mussi road" and by the grace of God, I saw a familiar landmark! IKEA!

I've only been to IKEA once here and it was enough for me to know that if i continued on for a bit, I would be able to get on another freeway that would take me home. THANK YOU GOD!!! Somehow the exit that I took blindly turned out to be the right one. People would say lucky but I say it was all God's hand. Soon I was chugging home and singing along to my Christian CD blasting out of my car's speakers.

Thank you lord for getting me out of this. You've protected me and saved me so many times. Thank you for sending your angels to guide me home. Amen.

boiling blood

2009-03-01T13:28:00.000-08:00

Oh GOD! WHHHHYYYYYY????

Getting tech support at my place of work is a gut wrenching experience. The people I deal with have no bloody clue about what to do! They are only good for pointing the blame at others. They just refuse to admit that they are ill equipped and should not even hold that position in the first place. Its more pleasant to ask for help from a camel's ass while its farting and its tail is slapping your face. These people redefined the phrase "vomit blood". What is wrong with this country?!!

If only i could summon burning hail stones from the heavens. It would come in handy.

Aural pleasure

2009-02-27T06:58:00.000-08:00

After a blissful 10 days back in Singapore, I am back in the dessert. Now usually when I'm out here, I have nothing to spend on except food. The shopping here is not to my taste and well, I fear for my life enough to stop me from venturing out to explore the shopping districts.

In Singapore though, its a different story! I pamper myself with gadgets and items that make me happy. And why not? You gotta perk yourself up every now and then. So this time round, I picked up a pair of sweeeet sounding earphones from Shure. These babies sound amazing and they block out all external noises at the same time! That leaves your ears with nothing but uninterrupted sound from your music machines.

I remember on one of my previous flights back to Singapore, I had a mother sitting across the row from me with her infant next to her. My feeble iPod earphones did nothing to block out the baby's wailing. Coldplay's "God put a smile upon my face" was being diluted with a huge dose of "waaaaaaaaah" and it wasn't coming from Chris Martin. I definitely didn't have a smile upon my face. I was contemplating executing either one of two options. Jam the baby's mouth with the amenity kit I was provided with or ask to be moved to economy class. Of course I did neither but an article in the gadget magazine I was reading caught my eye amid the agonizing cries. Noise isolating earphones! What an ingenious idea! So the moment I touched down, I researched and decided on the Shure SE530.

On my plane ride back this time, I was set. All you mommies with cry babies / loud talking arabs / no volume control china men, I am ready for you! I will shut you out on the airplane and enjoy my music! But there were none of them on the plane. Instead, I did not hear the stewardesses asking me if I wanted another drink. The captain's announcements were shut out as well. Hell, I couldn't even hear the passenger next to me when he asked if it was ok if he closed the window shades. All I heard were the full, rich sounds from coldplay, angels & airwaves and the like. These earphones made it feel like the bands themselves were having a concert in my head. Amazing! The audiophile in me was deeply impressed.

Bottom line is, dump the iPod earphones and invest in a good pair. They make a world of difference in terms of the sound quality. Even better if it has a sound isolation feature. Its portable aural bliss wherever you are.

rain rain go away

2009-02-08T12:03:00.000-08:00

It rained yesterday! Such a rare occurrence in these parts. Good thing it was my off day and I was safe and snug at home. Safe from the flooded roads that turn saudi drivers and their cars into air hockey pucks. Safe from the big angry drops that pick up all the sand in the air while making its way into the ground.

But as with all things Saudi, something had to go wrong. My internet stopped working. The little blinking modem light that usually indicated some connection or activity wasn't blinking anymore. I could not email, I could not MSN, I could not download stuff or surf the web. I could not do anything. It was the nightmare of all nightmares. As if being here wasn't mind blowingly boring enough, I had to be here without an internet connection.

I frantically brought up my web browser and typed in the address to my internet service provider. I needed the number for the technical help desk. "YOU ARE NOT CONNECTED TO THE INTERNET" my smug macintosh computer reminded me with the words splashed across a pristine white blank screen. Bugger. A flaw in the plan. I started to break out in cold sweat. My fingers were twitching and my upper lip was quivering.

I was desperate so I called my colleague. "DO YOU USE MOBILY INTERNET?!!?!?" I screamed into the phone. "No I don't have internet at home" he replied, in a calm and composed tone as if he was not weird at all for not having an internet connection at his residence. "Why? you need mobily internet?" he asked. I told him that I only needed the technical help number and that he was a useless bugger for this situation. But he actually came up with an answer! "try calling 1100. Its the mobily help desk for our mobiles" Thats right! My cellular connection is by the same company too! This might actually work.

Gingerly I keyed in 1100 into the keypad and listened to some weird grunting on the other end before a menu in English came up. Option 3 was for mobily broadband customers! I could see the light at the end of the tunnel! I greeted the technical arab help guy cheerfully and asked him if there was a problem with the network.

"Yes"

ok? what was the problem? would you like to share Mr arab help guy?

"wee tar"

Did you just call me a retard?

"wee tar! wee tar! you know? rain rain"

Ohhhhh weather! Ok I see I see. So when it rains? I lose my internet?

"Yes"

You guys are such a great establishment. Marvelous. So I will get my internet back when the rain stops?

"Yes, insha-allah"

Oh crap, the dreaded "I" word again. Directly translated, it means "if God willing" I've worked here long enough to know that when you ask for something and they tell you insha-allah, you're better off waiting for an elephant to climb a tree to shit on my face. So in Saudi Arabia, your internet connection is dependent on weather and God.

Thank God (my God, not the other one) the rain stopped and the internet connection returned soon after. If not I wouldn't be able to sit here and tell you how amazing Saudi Arabia is.

How's your new year been so far?

2009-01-05T11:52:00.000-08:00

Wow, a new year. 2009 already. How time flies. Did everyone have a good countdown? Big parties and lots of merry making? My new year's eve started with a bang. Quite a loud and painful one too I might add. Stumbling out of bed at 5am to switch off the alarm clock that I had placed at the far corner of the room (so that I would be forced out of bed) I crashed my knee straight into the corner of the TV bench. That sure woke me up good. Groaning I switched off the alarm and trudged to the bathroom to get ready for work. Getting up at this unGodly hour for work on new year's eve! Atrocious.

I had a special chartered flight to take care off that morning you see. Monumental pain in the ass if you asked me. And the worse thing is I'd have to stay all the way till around 10pm after my normal scheduled flight leaves. It was gonna be a 16 hr work day for me and I wasn't looking forward to it. But hunker on I did and by the time I got home at around 1030pm, I was knackered. No worries though, its not like I had any big party or celebration I had to rush to. In this part of the world, they don't celebrate the welcoming of a new year. Pretty much the same way they don't celebrate Christmas. I dunno, a new year must be against their religion too or something.

So as 1159pm became midnight, signifying the arrival of the first second of 2009 to tick by, I was already snoozing in bed.... but not for long. The bloody phone blasted me out of lala land and the voice on the other end informed me that the aircraft that left my station a few hours ago could not land due to bad fog at the destination airport and had diverted. So much for a happy new year. Ok, so what do you want me to do? Run there now with a giant fan and blow the fog away? No, they needed some info on the loadsheet so that the aircraft could get clearance to take off from the diversion airport. Sigh, time to get to work again. When it was all settled and I finally crawled back into bed, it was 4:30am. Thats the time people usually crawl into bed after a big new year's party. Bugger.

New year's day did not bode well for me either. Because of that diverted aircraft, the crew's hours got all messed up and my scheduled flight would be arriving 4 hours late! 4 hours! What in the world am I gonna do with this rabid group of passengers who are so keen on leaving the country? Sorry sir, I have to prolong your agony by keeping you here for another 4 hours. Please try not to die on me. I had to arrange for dinner for everyone so I went to the airport restaurant manager's office.

"I need to get some dinner happening please"
"ok, how many people?"
"I dunno. Not everyone may wanna eat. Can you just serve the meals and then we will pay for the number that was dished out?"
"No"
"why not?"
"The cook must know how many people to cook for"
"you know exactly how many people will eat here before you open your restaurant everyday?"
"No"
"then?"
"my cook will only prepare the amount you need"
"well i hope your cook is like Jesus coz it could be 5 or it could be 5000"
"ok I will ask him to make 200"
"yeah ok whatever"

In the end 148 people ate. The evening went on with me apologising to many for the delay and asking if they had a good dinner. When the flight finally took off at 1:10 in the morning, the first day of 2009 was already gone, never to return again. What a start to the new year. I pray that this is not a sign of things to come.

Have a great year ahead everyone.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

2008-12-24T13:29:00.000-08:00

Greetings! I just wanna wish everyone a wonderful and Merry Christmas! Can't believe another year has gone past but here's to an amazing 2009! Anyway, I won't say much today. I'll leave you with some pictures I took yesterday that surprisingly managed to capture the magical spirit and feeling of Christmas. Enjoy!

launch the lunch lunge

2008-12-18T14:05:00.000-08:00

December is usually my favorite month of the year. But not this year. I've had a non-existent birthday. I crashed the car. Work has been really tough and I'm gonna spend Christmas alone in a country that bans Christmas. Yippee.

Well after a particularly tough day, I told my staff that I had enough of this shit and we should all go out and get some lunch. Bring me somewhere with good food I said. So they did. It was a lebanese place that specialised in lebanese cuisine and fresh fruit juice. Sounds pretty good I thought, until I saw the menu.

Sheep balls? What in the world? But the next page gets worse....

Yes I'll have a dish of brain please, but I can't decide which will go better with sheep balls, tongue or tongue fatta? No of course I did not order any of that. Its easy to be miserable in Saudi Arabia without the help of a lebanese chef. Just the chicken kebab and lamb BBQ for me thanks.

Go Honda!

2008-12-15T14:15:00.000-08:00

I never thought the day would come when I would be saying this, but Honda is simply the future. Introducing the Honda FCX clarity. Sure its not exactly a Gallardo, 430 Scuderia or even an M3. Both in looks and in performance, the FCX is like a beached whale compared to the raging bull or prancing stallion.

But you know what? I'll take one anytime. You see, the FCX is powered by a hydrogen fuel cell. In essence, that means all you need to do is put hydrogen into the fuel tank and the fuel cell will combine the hydrogen with oxygen to produce electricity. This electricity then runs the electric motors that drive the car.

Unlike current electric cars that need to be plugged in for their batteries to be recharged, this one just needs filling up like how we fill up with petrol at the pumps. Now before you write it off for having an electric motor, Honda has done a decent job coz the FCX has 140 bhp. Acceptable performance, and the only exhaust it has is H2O. Water!

So besides saving the environment, you also eliminate the reliance on petrol. Well its about BLOODY TIME I say. Currently, this car is only available in select states in America. Thats because only these select states have hydrogen pump stations. What are they waiting for? Roll them out and lets do this worldwide! And C'mon Honda! make more of the FCX and lets get all the other car makers in on it too! (Audi are you reading this??) Its time we said goodbye to oil and kick the oil producing nations back into the dark ages and their flying carpets.

Where are you sleeping tonight

2008-12-15T09:28:00.000-08:00

As I lay in my bed last night, I could not sleep. I felt uncomfortable. It probably wasn't the bed. I've got a king sized bed here and I also have with me my luxurious micro-fibre pillow and bolster. The air-conditioning is set just right and the room is dark and quiet. The perfect conditions for a good night's rest.

But I could not fall asleep.

The discomfort I felt was familiar though. I've felt it before. Its the same feeling of despair and misery I felt as I lay on the floor of the tent that was pitched on uneven ground during a Boys' Brigade field expedition in Primary school. Its that same feeling of discomfort I felt as I tried to sleep on the ground sheet at my secondary school's leaders camp. The very same feeling of displacement as I tried to sleep on a concrete slab at the running track during my polytechnic's orientation camp, and then again when I went for the Orientation group leaders' camp.

In fact, as I lay there, I felt lost and my morale was low. Exactly the way I felt when I was sleeping in the bunks during my army days' basic military training phase. Not forgetting the many miserable nights during field camps. It felt exactly like that. Its probably how Frodo felt as he slept at the gates of Mordor while on his way to destroy the ring.

So, I guess I'm out of my element. Not in my comfort zone. I'm out here, in the wild. But I've been thinking about it, I've survived each and every one of those uncomfortable situations. In fact, I always come out a stronger and better person. I also look back at those challenges with fond memories. They were personal accomplishments that made me feel like I could take on life with renewed passion and tenacity.

I'll get through this. I have to. And one day I will leave this place and laugh in the face of the desert that could not claim me. Just another one of life's funny plans for me. At least I have a big comfy bed this time.

The ride home after a long day

2008-12-12T11:08:00.000-08:00

Thursday, 11th day of December in the year 2008. A really bad day in the office. Too many morons at work. It drains me. And my car is still in the workshop after all this time. Of course it is, this is Saudi Arabia.

I've had to resort to depending on one of my staff to drive me to work and back home again. So dropping myself into the passenger seat tonight, my staff was still wary of the fury I unleashed at the whole team earlier on. He cranked the car to life and we began the journey home.

"You want get something to eat boss?" Ayman asked, "Nah, I'm tired, I'll just go home thanks." Ayman then turned up the radio in his car that was tuned in to some "hip" station that played the trendiest arabic music. Everything sounded like crap to me. Some ludicrous arabic techno started blaring out the speakers. "oohhh, this is nice song" Ayman remarked. "are you kidding? I'd rather listen to sheep getting slaughtered." "You don't like?" he asked. "no".

At that very moment, a car overtook us at what felt like 2000km/h and as he passed, you could see that his boot was opened and there was a sheep in it. A sheep! "hey look at that, a sheep in that car boot." I said and Ayman proceeded to explain that the car was probably heading to Mecca for some sacrificial ceremony. Poor thing. As if the mad car ride in the boot wasn't enough to kill it.

"WATCH OUT FOR THE CAMEL!" I yelled as Ayman swerved the car and narrowly missed a camel that was walking at the side of the road.

Soon i reached my compound and Ayman dropped me off. "Goodnight Ayman, thanks for the ride." "No problem boss. Everything ok?"

Yeah, everything's fine except for this zoo of a country that I'm working in, I thought to myself. "Ya I'm good. See you tomorrow."

29 years and counting

2008-12-05T09:18:00.000-08:00

Phew! I've been around for 29 years now. 29 years, imagine that. God's been so good to me. As some of you might know, I almost did not make it to 29. For the first time in my 12 years of driving, I crashed my car. Fortunately no one was injured. In fact no other car was damaged. It was just me versus a concrete block.

It all started when I decided to head to a mall after work. Usually I do my shopping in the daytime and keep driving at night to a minimal. I should've stuck to my resolution. While trying to get onto the main road from a service road, I drove onto the filter lane and glanced over to check that there was no traffic. The next thing I knew, there in the middle of the filter lane was a concrete block the size of a washing machine! The road was dimly lit. There were no warning lights. The concrete block wasn't even brightly colored. By the time the honda's pissy headlights illuminated the concrete block it was too late. I had like an 18 word long expletive in my mind but as I slammed the brakes, I could only yell out "Wha.....". This was followed by a loud crash and the sickening crunching sound of car getting smashed up.

The impact felt like all my organs were pushing against my skin, almost bursting out. I also instinctively braced myself for the airbag to deploy but of course, my car did not have any airbags. Just as well I guess. The seat belts worked and left a nice deep bruise and abrasion on my shoulder and chest. The car stopped. I could taste blood in my mouth. Somehow, I managed to bite on my lower lip so hard it bled.

I was alive.

I got out of the car to inspect the damage. The bumper was cracked and twisted. The radiator was smashed up and there was radiator fluid all over the ground. The bonnet was bent and my fenders were pushed against the tyres. WHAT A STUPID PLACE TO PUT A CONCRETE BLOCK! I can't help but think that if I did not hit the brakes, and drove against the block (which did not move and inch) at full speed, I wouldn't be here typing now.

So here I am, car's in the workshop for at least the next 10 days I'm told. Not a good situation to be in but thank God I'm ok. 29 years old and still going strong.

poem

2008-11-25T12:51:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe I'm back in this hell hole

I'd rather be stuck in a toilet bowl

My leave went by in a flash

So much for my great singapore bash

My brain is numb, i've become dumb and I cannot think of anything else that rhymes to complete my poem.

Another day, another dollar

2008-11-11T10:43:00.000-08:00

Wow! The weather is actually bearable now! It does not feel like I'm living in an oven anymore. I could get used to this. Walking out onto the uneven tarmac to get to the staff car-park after work today, I actually felt a cool breeze gently blowing by. There's still sand all around but I guess thats normal since I'm in the middle of a desert.

The birds that used to hide under cars are out and about now, doing what they do best. Flying around and shitting on the parked cars. Great. Turning towards my car, I catch a glimpse of the setting sun. Its a big orange ball thats slowly sinking into the horizon. Reminds me that I'm still connected to the same solar system as my family and friends. Its still beautiful, even when seen from such a harsh land.

Somehow, the distant sunset that turns everything else into a silhouette has a calming effect on me. It makes me feel that all my worries are sinking away and its time to unwind and relax. Call it a day you know what I mean? So as I get into my car and crank up the engine, a smile usually breaks out on my face. Put the car in gear and ease off the clutch, I slowly pull out of the car-park. The crunching sound of rubber against gravel, sand and tarmac resonates through the cabin signifying the beginning of the end of a long day.

And then as I leave, the palm trees bow down and respectfully bid me farewell.....wait, the trees WHAT??

The smile on my face disappears and a look of disbelief and puzzlement takes its place. Even the palm trees have called it a day on Saudi Arabia and decided to die. As I drive off into the sunset, I'm muttering to myself, "Only in Saudi Arabia....."

Desert Rain

2008-11-07T11:11:00.000-08:00

What the hell is going on? In the week that just went by, it rained 3 times in Jeddah! In this land devoid of clouds and moisture, it actually rained! And not some pissy drizzle or tiny droplets that evaporate before hitting the ground. It was pouring cats and dogs and camels and baboons.

And obviously this place wasn't made with rain in mind. There is absolutely no drainage system. The pavements are made of the wrong materials. The F1 style saudi drivers suddenly forget how to drive. I'm serious. You can literally see the dumbfounded drivers with their eyes wide open and mouth gaping behind their steering wheels. They don't understand why their car is veering to the left when they are speeding through a giant puddle on the road. They wonder why they can't really see out of their windscreens. They cannot comprehend why their cars are skidding out of control and nothing seems to be responding.

ALL the roads get flooded and you might as well be driving a boat. And it does not help that the wipers on my car have been nicely baked and sundried to a crispy strip of tasteless jerky. All they do is splash the rain around my windscreen instead of wiping it off. Bugger.

And obviously, being in the middle of the desert, I don't own an umbrella. So getting caught in the rain while walking from the staff carpark to the airport terminal wasn't fun. Especially when the pavement tiles becomes more slippery than an ice cube coated in olive oil. Yup, I had a really spectacular fall. While running to get out of the rain, I slipped the moment I stepped on the pavement tiles. What happened after that would have been applauded by even the gold medal winning olympic gymnast. Hell I don't even think I've executed such a move while snowboarding before. In slo-mo my legs went over my head and I landed on my left shoulder. I was drenched, and very embarrassed as this all happened in front of a group of indian laborers seeking shelter at a shed not too far away. but most of all it hurt. I am now nursing a bruised shoulder, hip and left bum.

I normally don't mind rain. But this is Saudi Arabia, and nothing is normal here. So, no more rain please. Life here is crazy enough without the floods and the mud and the chaos.

Read all about it!

2008-10-31T13:16:00.000-07:00

Reading the newspapers these days really makes you feel depressed. I used to read the newspapers for their information and entertainment value. It kept me up to date with the latest around the world. It opened my eyes (though it wasn't always necessary the truth) to the outside of the shell that was home.

But now, more often than not, its telling you who's going bankrupt, who's dying from bombs or earthquakes and what you cannot eat. And that basically sums up the entire content.

China. What is going on there? How did it happen that this "up and coming super power" would stoop so low and wreck so much havoc in the food industry. With all the food scandals going on, I take longer to do my supermarket shopping now, making sure that I do not buy anything that is made in China. The milk and dairy thing was ridiculous but now I read in today's paper that eggs are no good too? The milk and eggs alone already make up 2/3 of my breakfast menu. I'll only be eating spoonfuls of strawberry jam for breakfast pretty soon if they found something wrong with the bread too. That is if they don't discover that the jam was actually a concoction of red paint and sugar first.

The financial crisis. So we're in another recession huh? Hell, I don't even know whats going on anymore. Who's going down. Who's paying who. Who wants their money back. Who got cheated. Who bought a house and couldn't afford the mortgage.

I don't read the papers anymore. I merely glance through them and then I chuck it into the corner and wait for the recycling guy to come pick them up.

The world has gone bonkers. And we only have ourselves to blame. Humans are really a virus that has infected the earth. Shitheads.

Another day, another conundrum

2008-10-16T15:12:00.001-07:00

Ahhhhhhhh, nothing like a nice hot cup of earl grey tea to help you unwind after a long day at work. Of course, in Saudi Arabia, to fully enjoy hot tea without feeling like you're ingesting molten lava while sitting in the earth's core, I had to turn the air-conditioning down to about 15 degrees. I also had to take off my shirt. In fact, it was a necessity to take off my pants as well and sit down wearing only my boxers. And now, I come to realise that I have unwittingly revealed that I am sitting here in my underwear, typing this blog entry. Poo.

Well no matter, coz that can't be anywhere as weird as what happened at work today. Picture this; Its the tail-end of the check-in process. Only 2 passengers are in the check-in area, each served by a counter. The other counters are empty, as was my dedicated business class counter. This random guy (turns out he was a passenger traveling on Garuda) walks over to the business class counter and stops about 4 feet away from the check-in agent. He looks untidy and he's got some funky head gear on. Not quite a turban, but not the saudi head-scarf either. Lets call him Scrappy.

Scrappy then proceeds to tug at my business class carpet! He pulls it about 2 meters away and lays it at an angle. He then gets on it and starts to pray! WHAT THE HELL? I was dumbfounded. Flabbergasted. Gobsmacked. What is this nincompoop doing?? Well obviously he's praying... but on my check-in carpet?!?! I walked over, and I could see the ground staff supervisor walking over as well.

Darren: "Excuse me sir, please get off my carpet"
Scrappy: "No, is my. sha allah I pray"
Darren: "not on my carpet you're not"
Scrappy: "Where you carpet? no yours is my"

I calmly bent forward and pointed to the "business class" font, next to the familiar golden bird. "what do you think this says?"

At which he looked up at me, eyes wider than the dinner plates I have at home. Hell, it looked like alla himself had reached out and grabbed scrappy's balls. The ground staff supervisor then grunted something to scrappy in arabic and scrappy walked off looking defeated. "sorry boss, sometimes these people dunno." Abdullah said to me. "Oh boss I will be on leave from November to December. Going to sell samosa. ok?"

"uh.....ok.....?" I replied. Walking over to my check-in staff, I muttered, "Shit I'm going nuts, I thought I heard Abdullah telling me that he was taking leave to go sell samosas"

"oh yes, he opens a shop by the road for pilgrims to buy samosa when they go for hajj" he replied. By now, I had no expression on my face. There was just too much weirdness going on. "you're shitting me!" I said. "oh sorry boss, maybe its from the hummus and beans I ate a lot for lunch". At this point, I just walked off to seek solace in my office.

Going up!

2008-10-11T01:16:00.000-07:00

Sorry if I've kept you waiting (Yes, all 3 of you who read my blog), but its been quite a hectic week for me. Well I'm here now so, here we go.

Moving on through the corridor by the dining area, you'll pass by a toilet, a closet and a store room.

Now, I would like to pause here for a moment and talk about God's sense of humor. See, back in MEL when I was holed up in that piegon hole of an apartment, I used to complain about how bad the design was coz there was practically no storage space. What that docklands apartment had were little holes placed randomly to keep your stuff in. And the lame excuse for a wardrobe didn't even fit my shirts coz it was too shallow! Whoever designed that apartment must've had hobbits with very little belongings in mind. I also used to lament about how having more than 1 toilet would be great for the days when Celine was taking a shower and I really needed to do a number 2.

So fast forward to Jeddah and guess what? My prayers were answered! In this house, I have 4 toilets, 3 of them equipped with showers. I have 2 giant wardrobes in the bedrooms and a walk-in wardrobe in the master. There are 2 store rooms which I don't use coz I dump all my stuff in the maid's room and heaps of shelves around the house for storing things. You ask for a wave and God gives you a tsunami.

Righto, heading up the stairs, you'll arrive at the landing that links the 3 bedrooms.The 2 smaller bedrooms are on the left, the master bedroom is on the right and we've got a bathroom right there in the center. So for my guests, whom I'll never get since there are no tourists allowed in SA, there are 2 bedrooms to choose from. Both equipped with a single bed, built-in robe and shelves. Finally, we then arrive at the master bedroom. Its got a king sized bed which is good since I like to sleep spread eagle, and pretty much everything you need to be comfortable.

So thats pretty much what I come home to everyday. Its comfy. No complaints here. Though it does get lonely and "empty" at times. Oh well... I should just be glad that I have food on my plate, roof over my head and a big comfy bed.

I'll leave you with a picture taken from the window of my bedroom. Till the next time...

Out of this world!

2008-09-29T12:21:00.000-07:00

Greetings and salutations!

Ok so I promised that I'll bring you upstairs in the next post. But before that, so many people have been asking me, what is Jeddah like? So my bedroom will have to wait till the next time as I set out to tackle this burning question.

First off, lets get the location right. Jeddah is one of the major cities of Saudi Arabia. Some even call it the commercial capital of the country. Located on the western coastline of Saudi Arabia, its a thriving port city. Having been here for a month now, I can say that this place is out of this world. And it is.

Located about 1.17899 billion kilometers away from earth when the entire solar system is lined up in a straight row, Saudi Arabia boasts a culture and lifestyle you'd never imagine was possible. And if you think thats a lot to contend with, there's always the landscape and surroundings.

True to its alienic persona, you feel like you're landing on mars when you look out of the aircraft window before touch-down. But in fact, as my diagram above has shown , you're further from mars than you think you are. Interplanetary travel on a boeing. Imagine that.

Here's the view from my hotel room during my initial days here. The breathtaking view brought tears to my eyes. Mainly because the breath I was taking was full of sand and obviously some of it got into my eye.

Of course I've already mentioned some of the adjustments to my lifestyle in my previous entries and chats I've had with friends.
- No ice cold beer to enjoy after work (Man I miss my crown lager)
- No socialising with members of the opposite sex unless its a spouse. Which makes me wonder, how did you meet your spouse in the first place?
- gotta time your shopping to make sure that it does not coincide with the prayer timings.
- All women are covered up. All you see are men, whom sometimes, I wish were covered up too.
- Various public places are segregated into 2 sections. One for single men, the other for families.
- The mad driving style on the road. Its like a warzone out there.

Even the birds do things a little differently here. Usually, you'd think that under a car would be the last place you'd wanna be. But here, they stay there to survive.

When I'm out and about, I marvel at the vast amounts of space rock and sand. Its everywhere. Granted you see the occasional palm tree here and there. But why does this place look like the inhabitants of zargon 4 invaded recently? It looks like a warzone! There's rubble and shells of destroyed buildings everywhere. As for the roads, lets just say the surface of the moon would feel like the backside of a new born baby when compared to the road surfaces here.

But you know what? Despite everything, I'm laughing most of the time. Not only at the insanity of this place, but also at the amazing experience and opportunity I've been given. Just the other night, as I was walking to my car after a long day at work, I found myself looking upwards to the night sky. There was a gentle breeze blowing, accompanied by the sound of the palm trees rustling in rhythm with the distant roar of an aircraft billowing down a runway. I could see the stars. The same stars that you'd probably see if you look up at night on earth. As I stood there on the warm desert floor, I took a deep breath and I thought to myself, wow, I'm in Saudi Arabia.

Week 3 gone by

2008-09-20T12:52:00.000-07:00

Time sure flies! Feels like I just landed in Saudi Arabia not too long ago. At the same time I feel like I've been here for ages. This place messes with your mind. At least I still have a mind to mess with, I'm surprised I haven't lost it! Anyhow, many have been asking about the kind of accommodation I live in here. Well, the majority of expats here live in what is known as a compound. Its like a community within walls and each entrance/exit is guarded. Security is pretty good in these compounds and the people living within don't have to worry so much about the restrictions that are in place everywhere else. So women can walk around in shorts and T shirts and a man can talk to a woman even if they're not married. Wow! How about that?

Anyhow, photos of the security aren't allowed in these parts so I secretly snapped one while I was driving home the other day. Here you can check out one of three machine gun installations that guard the entrances and exits.

First time I saw it I was thinking to myself "Holy cow! Is that for real?" What kind of crazy people do they have here to warrant that kind of setup? Quite worrying. And its not like the pissy rifle that I handled during my NS days. Its more like a full-on Rambo badda badda (Celine's sound) machine gun.

Ok, so moving on, after you reach the guard house and let them inspect your resident's label on your car, resident's card from your wallet, recite the secret resident's pass phrase and finally give them the secret resident's handshake and wave, you go through and then pull up into the driveway of your unit. They call it a "villa" but I think its too posh a word. Villa stimulates thoughts of a luxurious establishment by the beach adorned with high-end fixtures with german brands that cannot be pronounced without sounding like you're clearing your throat. A villa is something that will feature in tatler magazine or the latest Architect's digest. What I have here, is a box from the 80's with bits of wood nailed to it.

And yes, thats my amazing grey Honda Civic 1.6 with ABS. No, not Assisted Braking System. Its Air-Bags Short. Once you're parked and through the front door, you see the kitchen.

Its pretty good sized and has all the basic components of a kitchen. No complaints here. There's even a water dispenser thingo coz apparently, if you drink the water from the tap, you'll be filled with so much metals that it'll react in your guts and make you a walking time-bomb. So don't drink from the tap unless you wanna commit suicide (bombing). Now, if you look behind, you'll see the maid's room (which I have decided to use as a store room since I don't have a live-in maid) and next to it is the laundry area.

So walk past the kitchen and you'll find yourself in the dining area. The unit comes with a full sized dining table and huge cabinet to display all your wares. Pretty useless since I live alone and don't have huge meals. But its pretty good for having my morning cereal and reading the newspaper sprawled across the whole table.

So from the dining area, we then transit to the living area. I converted one end into my "work" area. Got my trusty mac setup there. All my music, entertainment and most importantly, the link to the real world is here. The other end has got the sofa set and TV with cable. I haven't sat on the sofa since I got here. Its green. It'll be like seating in a sea of moss.

Phew! This blog post is getting a bit longer than I expected! Tell you what, I'll leave you with a shot of my back patio and that'll conclude the tour of the ground floor. I'll take you guys upstairs in my next post! Hope you enjoyed the guided tour!

Puff the orange loofah

2008-09-15T10:48:00.000-07:00

Asalaam mualaikum!

Hey, in Rome, do as the Romans do right? Now everyone who reads this has to say mualaikum salaam back to me. Come to think of it, are people living in Rome still called Romans? Or are they just collectively called Italians now?

Anyhow, Its been 2 weeks since I arrived in Saudi Arabia and honestly, I haven't had a decent shower. Ok before you guys go EEEEWWWW, I bathe twice a day ok! Sometimes even 3. Its just that, I never feel like my shower is complete without a loofah. You know? You gotta have that good scrub down after going out and exposing yourself to the grossness of the outdoors. Especially so in Saudi Arabia. I don't know why but it always feels so yucky and grimy outside. Doesn't help that its hot and humid here too. Much like Singapore but with an oven strapped to your backside.

One of the things I kicked myself about was not getting a Loofah from the bodyshop in Singapore before I came here. That simple scrounged up ball of fabric makes a huge difference for me. Therapeutic even. You see, after a good scrub down, you feel like all the grime and dirt and sand is washed away, along with your troubles and worries. You come out of the shower feeling clean and refreshed. You can almost feel yourself glowing. Thats what a real bathe is about. Some like to soak in the bathtub and come out looking like an oversized raisin. Some just want to jump in and hose themselves down and thats it. I like a thorough scrub down.

So I couldn't take it anymore. I deserve a decent shower! Especially when I've been robbed of other pleasures in life, SA isn't gonna take away this one. After work I ventured into a mall that was relatively near the airport. First time being in a mall in SA and man! It was HUGE! Gigantic. But more about that in another post. I walked around hoping to find some kind of bath/shower shop or home essentials shop. Anything! Shop after shop I looked and there was everything except a Loofah. I wasn't ready to stop a saudi and ask him where to buy a Loofah. Do they even call it a Loofah? That might be an arabic word saying that your mom looks like a boiled camel for all I know.

So after the 10th head scarf shop and countless outlets selling shoes, bags, watches, fashion, sports, carpets, camel saddles etc etc... I was ready to give up. I was starting to worry that I'd forget how to get back to the entrance to the carpark where I parked my car. I thought to myself, GOD! if only bodyshop would open here!

I turned around to the left and BAM! THE BODY SHOP!!! They DID open in SA. Praise the Lord! I must've been the happiest asian guy in Saudi Arabia to see a bodyshop outlet. So I hurried in and true to the foundation of the bodyshop, there were many brightly colored Loofah balls arranged by color and placed in different sections of the shop. I was ecstatic.

So here I am now, feeling cleaned and refreshed, typing about how you can never take things for granted. Not even a simple bodyshop Loofah. Nothing like a tough station to teach you about the little things in life eh?

Its exactly like in the movies!

2008-09-08T10:01:00.000-07:00

Saudi Arabia I mean. You know how you watch movies and the country is portrayed as run down buildings, crazy roads and heaps and heaps of sand? Thats it! Before I came here, I googled Saudi Arabia just to have a look what I was in for and the pictures looked alright. Nice modern buildings by the red sea and all that. I wish I could meet the fabricating spin doctor who put those pictures up as a welcoming introduction to SA and pound him into the sand of the beaches at the red sea.

Oh, for those who do not know, I've been posted to Saudi Arabia and yes I haven't blogged in 283365 days but who cares? How's everyone by the way? Hope all is well.

Its been slightly more than a week since I got here and I'm still learning my way around.

Saudi Arabia is a shocking country. Jeddah is supposed to be the most open of the cities in SA, however, its still a culture shock for me. Firstly, all the women are covered up! As a mate of mine would put it, all you see is the letter box slot. Every woman must also be accompanied by their husband or some relative and if they are stopped by the religious police, they gotta produce documents to prove that they are related. So most of the time, I only see MEN. I go to the shops, MEN. In the airport, MEN. When I eat in the restaurants, MEN. There are seperate sections for restaurants, one for single men and the other for families. I shudder to think what would happen to you if you walked through the wrong door. You'd probably be pelted to death by stale bread or something.

Oh and they hold public beheadings in the city square every friday. Also, if you're caught stealing, your hands get chopped off at these sessions as well. Someone offered to bring me to one to have a look but I politely declined.

The heat here is shocking as well. on a good day, its 38 degrees outside. I guess its normal since i'm in the middle of a desert. And this place looks like a desert too. Sand everywhere! And for some reason, it also looks like a warzone. There's always some rubble or demolished building wherever you look. the small roads are in a shocking state while the main roads are barely acceptable. And driving! Thats a whole different adventure in itself. Road rules don't seem to exist here. The Saudis do not follow speed limits or road markings. They swerve and go wherever they want. And they all think they're F1 racers. I can cruise along at 120-130 km/h here without worrying about getting stopped by the traffic police. They don't stop you for road hogging you see. Besides, the saudis will just horn you and then overtake you at 200km/h. I've even seen 2 cars come to a screeching halt in the middle of the freeway just to wind down their windows to talk to each other. They still think they're riding camels out here. Shocking. Doesn't help that I gotta get used to driving on the other side of the road (left hand drive here) and my 1.6 litre Honda civic is a manual with NO AIRBAGS. oh but petrol is about $0.20 a litre here. even water's not that cheap.

Things like food and general shopping here is quite cheap. I can survive on quite little if I wanted to. I hear that sales are really good too. However, I've been warned that counterfeit stuff are pretty common here. even in the so called boutiques and departmental stores. (I've already seen some counterfeit items in the duty free area of the airport) Oh! and if you are shopping in a mall or supermarket during any one of the 5 prayer times during the day, be prepared to be locked in the shop for about 20 mins while the prayers are going on. Sometimes they even turn off the lights so you're just stuck there in the dark contemplating how it is that your life turned out the way it did.

Its really a different world out here. I'm still coming to terms with it but I know that at the end of the day, it'll be a good experience that not many can have. I wonder if I can buy an oil field here?

Time is of the essence

2007-10-01T11:04:00.000-07:00

Welcoming the Audemars Piguet Royal Oak Ref. 15300ST to my horology collection.

You can never have enough time.

The Exodus

2007-10-01T10:54:00.000-07:00

Phooooo Weeeee! I haven't blogged in ages! Time sure flies and now, one by one my fellow course mates are being posted out! Joe's gone to Beijing while Michelle is on the plane to LAX as I type this. Well I guess its just them and Bob for now since Kenrick, Reuben and I are still stuck here in good o'l Singapore. Not for too long I hope.

Good luck you guys who are out there now though I hear that our friends in China won't be able to read this coz of the ban on blogger by the government there. Whats up with that??

Oh and Bob has gone to Japan for a holiday. Again. He barely got married and already he's on his second honeymoon. I waved goodbye to him at F54 today while I was on duty doing the departure south wing. Yes, while I was on DUTY.

Which reminds me, ever wondered how you're on duty and then BAM! something happens with a passenger which requires the immediate attention of the DM. That really erks me. When we're out on our rounds, the ground staff always act like we're flies bothering them and then suddenly the walkie goes off "DM XXXX can you please go to gate XXX. The staff there needs your help" and when we get there its always, "eh boss, sorry ah, I don't know how to handle this"

But thats not what I wanna talk about, rather, its how we react to those extraordinary situations. I gotta be honest, whenever I'm in the shower, my mind is always buzzing on overload and conjuring up scenarios that can happen at work. And I ALWAYS have an amazing retort or sentence to say to a passenger for whatever reason they give at all. Be it at the check-in counter, at the departure gates or on board the plane! You name it and I'll settle it. But then when it comes down to it, when the passenger is glaring at you and demanding the 9 planets (or is it 8 now? I'm not sure anymore) those amazing pre-molded answers go flying out the window and is promptly minced up by the nearest rolls-royce trent engine on a boeing. Instead, what comes out of my mouth is an unflattering, "Oh....uh....I see. Sorry". Well sometimes at least.

Thats not right. The passengers should be afraid of ME! They should be at my mercy since I determine if they are to get on the plane or not. In those few hours that they fly on the airline, their lives belong to me! Muahahahaha.

Right. Well it doesn't always happen that way. Most of the time I'm stumped coz I cannot fathom what the passenger wants anyway. Either that or I just cannot decipher what they are saying. Sigh, its the nature of the job I reckon. We get better at this with each passing day. Righto, time for bed mates! Hope y'all are having a great time! Later~

The adventures of C&D!

2007-09-03T09:47:00.001-07:00

A Gazillion years later...

2007-07-23T09:27:00.000-07:00

And I finally post a new blog entry. Ok this blog thing is getting tiresome. But here goes anyway!

What have I been up to? Training, training and more training. Work has been really cool. Its been slightly more than 7 months of training and as my training phase draws closer to its end, I am getting ready to be posted overseas. Where I'm going...I don't know, but I have a pretty good idea where I want to go. For that I'm leaving it entirely to God. Let's see where this adventure called life takes me. Sweeeet.

I'm a totally changed person wardrobe wise. I've never seen so many shirts in my wardrobe before. Its always been board shorts and T shirts for me. But look into my wardrobe now and you see shirts! 1 for eveyday of the month even. And *gasp* pants and TIES! Yes, I look different now. But only during office hours. The climate in singapore doesn't allow you to stay in that get-up for long.

Other than that, nothing much has changed. Oh but I have picked up a new hobby! Watch collecting! After wearing my trusty and loyal Tag Heuer for 15 years, I have ventured into the upper echelon of horological artistry. I never knew watches could be so fascinating and a marvel of mechanical mastery. As "revolution" magazine would put it, watches are machines with a heartbeat. I could not agree more. Early this year I added a Master World Geographic from Jaeger LeCoultre to my inventory. Its a beautiful piece that tells me the time for 24 time zones at a glance. Pretty handy for my job.

Now, me being me, I decided to get another one a month ago. This time its a simple modern classic from A.Lange & Sohne. The epitomy of Saxon horology. Its a breath taking holding the Lange 1 in your hand. Everyone needs a good watch.

Time waits for no man. Till my next post....

clear mind of the swim

2007-04-10T07:36:00.000-07:00

WooOOOooo! Nothing like a good swim to clear the mind and loosen the joints. The swimming complements my running, and the running complements the swimming. In the midst of this regime, I can throw in some biking and tada! Almost like a triathlete except that I don't run and bike in the gay looking tight suits.

But one thing came to mind. I realised after my recent trip to Melbourne to visit my absolutely hot and yummilicious girlfriend, that the gels and creams and toiletries that we use in Singapore is always a yucky texture. Toothepaste for example always comes out nice and gelly and firm in the cooler climate of Australia, the way it should be. Whereas in Singapore, we get a gross not liquid but not really gel texture. Shampoo too, stays in the palm of your hands when you squeeze it out of the bottle instead of dripping and tricking down your hands. We're not experiencing our toiletries the way we should I tell ya! How annoying!

And I can't help but make a mention about everyone's "favourite" OS again. Windows is the bomb I say. Literally. It always blows up in your face when you need it most. My mom came around with her VAIO in the evening and asked me to have a look at it coz she recently did an update and the laptop wasn't working properly like before. So I powered it up and after windows boots up a huge warning window appears and screamed something like, "Warning! The vendor has made an illegal change of the system .dll to section of main memory that has not been authorised for .dll segment constrains. Contact vendor for proper allocation blah blah blah...." you get the drift. Why does microsoft always have to launch warning windows and screens to intimidate people in a language that no one understands?? I'm pretty sure its in English but after reading it countless times I still have no clue what it wants me to do. I dunno if its the sentence structure or the grammar or whatever, it just doesn't make any sense! If everyone in the world spoke like that, there would be total anarchy. Stupid system.

Anyhow, I rattled along for too long now. So I'm gonna give it a break and return for more next time. Later~

The VascoEra

2007-03-27T05:43:00.000-07:00

A good friend of mine is in the media industry down in Melbourne and this is his latest production. Awesome stuff. If only he'll give me a role in one of his videos....

www.youtube.com/thevascoera2

Rain therapy

2007-03-24T08:43:00.000-07:00

Its pouring again. U2's electrical storm is playing in the background, how apt. I've always loved the rain. Especially when I'm indoors at night. The sound of the raindrops pelting the windows is really therapeutic. Now with my new room, its even better coz a portion of the ceiling actually forms the roof so I can hear the rain hitting the roof. Pitter patter.

Its nice because I feel so protected. Dry and comfortable even when the sky is pouring and the trees are losing their leaves from the angry winds. At the same time, I feel like there's some kind of purification ritual going on. The rain pouring down, clearing our skies of the haze, washing away the dirt and the grime, cleaning the impurities of the world. And you know what? The world becomes more beautiful, even for only that short moment. The air is fresh and everything is clear.

I loved jumping in puddles as a kid, dancing and playing in the rain. I wonder why I don't do that anymore? Maybe coz people will look at me weird and think that its bizarre for a grown up guy to be enjoying himself drenched in the rain. Sometimes when I'm doing stuff like running, wakeboarding or anything in the open, I secretly enjoy it when its rains. Sure I love the sun but the rain is fine with me.

Ok, enough rattling on. I'm gonna slide under the covers and enjoy the rain's lullaby while it lasts. G'night!

I have a blog?!

2007-03-21T09:08:00.000-07:00

Oh! Goodness me! I have a blog right here! I totally forgot about it! No posts since the beginning of the year and even the chatterbox thingamajik has died. (Ok let me resurrect it)

Though in the short 3 months that I have been missing, heaps of things have changed in my life. Its been pretty amazing and I am a blessed and happy fella. You know how things just go by in life that are mundane? Well I love these mundane things coz I feel so alive doing it! My job is simply swell. I actually look forward to going to work and I enjoy the company that I'm in. The fact that I have pretty good hours for now don't hurt too. Though it won't be like that anymore once I get posted overseas. But you know what? I'm actually looking forward to it. The challenges I will be facing and how I'll laugh at them as I overcome! And how often do you get the opportunity to live and work in different countries in your life? Sweeet.

God's been good to me. He's blessed me and met so much of my needs. Great job, great house, a totally new wardrobe, swanky gear for work, new phone, new watch blah blah blah the list goes on. But on top of it all, he's given me a totally awesome relationship. She's a big part of the reason why i'm so pleased with life right now. Every guy needs a hottie who's talented and loving and has a sweet melodious voice that is pleasant to the soul. I'm glad I found one before I die.

Righto, looks like this entry has gotta do for now. So, how does this thing work again? Where do I click to publish it. What in the world is new blogger / old blogger? later~

Farewell 2006, Hello 2007!

2006-12-30T10:28:00.000-08:00

Wowee!

Its been ages since I last blogged and heaps of stuff have happened since! In fact there's so much to say I don't even know where to start! So I guess I'll just ramble on for now. This entry is more of a reflection for me I reckon....

2006 didn't start off too hot. It was plagued with uncertainty, failed relationships and a lot of confusion. I didn't know if I wanted to remain in Melbourne after my graduation or return to Singapore to look for a job. It was a pretty tough decision for me back then, and I gotta admit that I made it without a clear mind. Return to Singapore I did and I gotta say, it was tough at first. I was so unsettled most of the time and I didn't have peace within me. I thought maybe I made the wrong choice but now I know it was God starting his work with me.

Tried looking for a job for a while but nothing came through. As July approached, I became less and less motivated with the job hunt coz I had plans to return to Melb to snowboard! What an awesome time it was! Up till now I still wonder what possesed my mom to approve my extravagant holiday. Perhaps it was God at work again. I had a great time and I established some good friendships during the Melbourne stint. Got to know some of my melbourne friends in greater depth and the friendships that blossomed from there was well worth it.

But! A flaw in having such a great time in Melbourne was returning to reality when it all ends. Returning to Singapore, I might've sunk into depression when I was under more pressure to find a job. Well, maybe not depression. I wasn't depressed, I was just....numb. Fortunately, I had my amazing cell group to get me through this low point. Before I left for my snowboarding trip, I already knew I was in the midst of very special people. W133 is really an amazing cell group, full of amazing, talented and loving people. And while I'm having a great time with the cell group, I'm growing closer to God as well! Smashing!

So anyhow, by God's grace and floated by my cell group's encouragement, I finally landed a job. Right, which means I'm officially out of retirement. hur hur hur. So life is looking pretty good now. Of course in the midst of all this, my parents bought a new place and I have a bigger, more spacious room now. Better living space for me! Sweet!

Now, back to the point where life is full of unexpected moments. My negative sentiments towards relationships have also been turned upside down! And in the most unexpected circumstance as well. However, all is good and amazingly smashing now. An absolute delight is what I'll say about it. Brilliant!

So, 2006 was pretty much an off year for me. It was like a year long break to fix whatever was wrong with me, and now I'm all set to get back into it. I may have started 2006 in the pits but I'm ending it with a bang, and I have God to thank for it. Happy new year to you all!

Wheels for FFF

2006-11-07T19:12:00.000-08:00

About 2 weeks ago, my cell group had some combined cell group meeting. I think 7 cell groups were involved and following the cell group meeting, we had a scavenger hunt that they named wheels for F cubed. Basically, the FFF stood for Friends, Fun and Food. The gist of it was pretty much this; teams driving around the city area looking for the solutions to the given clues. Not all of us got to stick to our own cell group members though. Adrian and I were teamed up with Irenaus and Chris from a different CG. We got along swell and managed to complete all the tasks. Here's a brief look at what went down.....

As you can deduce, my team emerged victorious and we won the prize of a $100 marche voucher. It was pretty fun and we made new friends. The only food we encountered during the scavenger hunt was a gross tasting myanmar century egg dish, but I guess the $100 marche voucher more than made up for it. Friends, Fun, Food. Swell.

Back to fantasy land!

2006-11-06T05:34:00.000-08:00

Greeting's y'all!

Wow its been a while hasn't it? I almost forgot I had a blog back here. Apologies to the friends who've been complaining about the lack of entries of late. I've been pretty busy you see. Condo launches here. Property researches there. Heaps of stuff to settle leaving me with very little free time. And when I do get some free time on my hands, I go meet my friends. My fantasy friends.

Righto, before you start calling me loony or a schizo who imagines fantasy friends, let me explain. The 12th installment of the final fantasy series from square-enix was recently released and I have a copy! I've always been a fan of final fantasy and I've been playing the RPGs (role playing game) since they first appeared on the 16 bit super nintendo systems!

As usual, the game is filled with mystical creatures, over the top costumes and a wide spectrum of accessories and weapons. All very fantastically fantasy-ish. And of course, you're out to save the world. again.

The anticipation I felt while I was loading the DVD into my PS2 was immediately washed away the moment the opening theme started flowing out of my speakers. A wave of nostalgia swept through my room and i was transported back to the various times when i was playing final fantasy all day and all night long. In fact, I felt like I was being reunited with long lost friends. It feels like I'm actually running around in the final fantasy worlds with the heroes and battling monsters and villians. It feels like I'm on this great adventure with them, solving great mysteries and unlocking the secrets of the world. And ultimately, it feels like I'm saving the world with them.

I guess I get transported into another world where I can be a hero. Just running around on a great adventure and killing monsters. Free from the mundane and routine world that I know. Free from my worries and troubles. Free in my fantasy land. Its a pretty good feeling and you can even call it my happy place. Oh my, what am I doing here? I should be in front of the TV with my PS2! laterrrr.....

right about now, firestarter

2006-10-16T08:17:00.000-07:00

Anyone remember that song, Firestarter, by the Prodigy?

"I'm a firestarter, twisted firestarter. You're the firestarter, twisted firestarter"

Maybe those dumbass morons in Indonesia have been blasting that song a little too often. They're burning up their forests and what not to clear the land. Unwittingly, they're destroying the environment and the eco-system, not to mention the daily lifelihood of millions living in the neighbouring countries. Bastards.

The pollution from the fires is wrecking havoc everywhere! Planes are grounded due to poor visibility. Those with respiratory problems are having their lives placed at risk. Outdoor activities have to be limited and there's no such thing as going out to breath in the fresh air or to smell the roses! I can't go for my runs! I run to keep fit. How am I supposed to do that now with the haze level in Singapore hovering at unhealthy levels? Just taking a walk outside causes irritation to my eyes. And you know what happens if I don't keep my fitness up? My metabolic rate will go down, and a lowered metabolic rate means you will grow fat! I wanna put on weight but I don't wanna grow fat! I'm supposed to put on weight while staying trim and toned. Now that age is catching up, my metabolic rate is bound to slow down and this haze is NOT HELPING!

Is this my fate?? To go from skinny chicken legs to fatty bom bom? Noooooo......

iChat DoTA

2006-10-07T12:30:00.000-07:00

Greetings y'all! Man its really hazy out today in Singapore! The PSI index hit 150 today. That's in the unhealthy range. Someone stop the bloody indonesians who are slashing and burning up the jungles!!! Anyhow, after the customary "after church service dinner and fellowship" session today, I came straight home. In the comfort of my air conditioned room, away from the heat, humidity and the haze. And what better way to maintain quality time with my fellow cell group members than with iChat? Of course, this is currently limited to me, Alan and Melanie coz you'd need a camera/mic equipped mac to enjoy the full features of iChat.

And thus, our maiden attempt at a 3-way video conference via iChat commenced at about 22:45 E.S.T and it was a success! It was hilarious too and I must say, iChat is the best video conference program I have ever used. (well? what are you all waiting for? go get a mac already!) Here's a little screen capture of what it looks like.

As I was musing on the screen shot and marveling at how the reflections at the bottom of the participants' faces were nicely rendered, it occurred to me that our expressions and poses were strangely familiar. Then it struck me! Back when I was in melbourne and living with the Hanafi's, many a time I'd watch the boys play Dota. Dota is a spinoff game from the warcraft franchise and Wilfred, Josh and Brian are nuts about it! The most interesting part though, was when they'd select their heros. You'd get to choose from a wide variety of heros, each with their own special powers and appearance. I was always intrigued at which hero they'd choose and why. Anyhow, here's what I noticed.

Alan's upward stance and firm jaw-line, coupled with his neutral smile gives him similar features with the hero known as the stone giant.

My goggle eyed-toothpaste representative smile gives me the creepy and eccentric look thats not very different from the hero called the skeleton king.

And finally my favourite would be the lovely couple of JK and Mel. By sheer coincidence (and my total amusment), the way they are positioned and how much of their shoulders and bodies fill up the lower horizon mimick the look of the 2 headed Orge Magi Hero. Or is it heros?

Right, and it is with these amazing observations that I shall have to bid you farewell for it is wayyyyy late and I have to get up to go wakeboarding tomorrow! Later~

ruminations of sentience

2006-10-04T10:52:00.000-07:00

Right. So i'm 26 years of age, going on 27 come December. That'll make me just about 3 years shy of being in existence for 3 decades. Yeowza, sounds like some kind of relic! Well, not really. But still, one can't help but wonder, what is life about? I've been around for over a quarter of a century and I still haven't figured it out.

Sometimes I hear a gleeful exclamation that life's GREAT! Most of the time I hear murmurs that life sucks. Do these people even know what they're talking about? Or is it just a careless expression of their current situation of state coz more often than not, these same people have been known to use both phrases. So which is it?

When I look back at what I've been through so far, my life seems to be fine. Actually its been pretty good. I've always had a roof over my head, a comfortable bed to sleep on and meals to keep me growing ( Yes I'm still growing ). I've got wonderful parents who nag at me but also provide generously. I always have my needs met and a fair amount of my wants granted. But despite all this, I sometimes still sit back and wonder, is this all there is to life? It seems like I'm not really full on and jumping for joy at being able to take a breath every few seconds.

People who've lived through wars. Those that have suffered from disasters and calamities. Those who survived accidents. Now these are some people who would clobber me on the head and admonish me for not being thankful for everything that I have now. And the fact that I'm blogging about it now kinda means that I know that I should appreciate it. And I do. I really do. But why is it I don't feel a giant blast of euphoria whenever I wake up in the mornings? I'm sure someone who's been hiding for his dear life would when he wakes up to find out that the war is over. Please God, don't misunderstand, I'm not asking for something horrible to happen to my life. I'm just wondering if its absolutely neccesary to go through a rough patch to truely appreciate the good times? I wanna just live in the good times and be happy! NOW! :) <--- (what a fake smile, you'd look psychotic if your face were in that exact shape )

Is ignorance truely bliss? Would I be in absolute rapture if I were living up in a mountain, not knowing about the happenings and the technologies of this world? I wouldn't want something if I didn't know it existed right? And if I don't want anything, I'd be totally satisfied instead of constantly thinking when I can earn enough to buy that sports car or get a hold of the latest Mac with the most gorgeous screen. I wouldn't even worry about earning money for anything! I'd just live everyday as it comes. Gathering food when I feel hungry. Sleeping when I'm tired. Probably invent my own games to pass the time. Sounds pretty boring huh but if it were true, I wouldn't know better anyway since I don't know that snowboarding or playstation exists.

So why does this dilemma exist? Whats the confusion about? How can I write so much nonsense over nothing? I'm not sad. But I'm not happy either. I'm just. Normal. Can I even say that? I'm normal. Sounds weird. Say it out loud to yourself slowly. I'm NORMAL. "Normal" is an adjective that implies conformity with established norms or standards. So I'm conforming? What exactly is that standard that I am comparing myself to be conforming?

Ok its time for bed. Goodnight.

Voice of an Angel

2006-10-02T04:09:00.000-07:00

Whenever I am weary, You pick me up and never let me go

You give, me strength

For when I’m lost and lonely, you walk with me and show me the way

You’ll be, my friend

Angel voice, I long to have you near

Your precious words are all I wanna hear

And let nothing, come between us

Coz nothing in this world can ever compare

hoax obliteration

2006-10-01T12:11:00.000-07:00

I am vexed. I was alerted to a website depicting my own demise. dnew356.blogspot.com showcases a comic that deceives audiences into believing that I was devoured by a shark. Such subterfuge will not be tolerated! When I find out who these insurgents are, I will personally send Amber, my harbinger of death, to annihilate and destroy. Just you wait dnew356! Muahahahahahahahaha

Animal Planet

2006-09-28T12:50:00.000-07:00

I was having supper with a friend recently when a giant beetle fell off the branches above us and landed on our table with a huge thud. It struggled for a little while before flipping itself off its back and then proceeded to crawl towards me. At this moment my friend started freaking out whereas I calmly scooped up the beetle with my hand and threw it into the nearby grass patch. My friend was properly horrified and shrieked at me, "How could you do that? GROSS!"

Why was it gross? The beetle was a creature of nature. One of God's creations. It wasn't intending to harm me or anything. It just happened to drop into the wrong place. I'm one who is generally at peace with nature. I love animals, and animals love me. In fact, after going through my blog, I've come to realise that I'm constantly in contact with nature and her animals in my adventures. Some have even been photographically documented.

So I say this to all you people out there. Love nature and other living creatures around you and life will be a more exciting place to hang out!

Extreme sport?

2006-09-27T09:43:00.000-07:00

I'm going wakeboarding on the 8th of October and I was asking my cell group if they'd wanna come along and wow! What a response I got! Turns out there's gonna be 20 people going so we'll need about 4 boats. Some of them have never tried before and asked me all sorts of questions. Is it fun? Does it hurt? Can you die? etc etc.

Well, wakeboarding is an extreme sport I guess. And as with every other extreme sport, there are risks involved, coupled with the possibility of pain. However! You shouldn't let that get in the way of the immense amount of fun you will have! Wakeboarding is extremely fun and extremely addictive. It gives you a good workout too. For beginners, I daresay that you will feel no pain at all when you fall. The boat's moving to slow for you to hurt yourself when you're starting out in the sport. The only pain you'll feel will probably come from the aches the day after. What you'll get is great fun under the sun, wind rushing by as the boat glides on the water and great fellowship with those on the boat with you.

So be prepared for the fun time you're all gonna have and ride safe!

ahoy matey's!

2006-09-24T11:17:00.000-07:00

Aloha! Guess what I did today? It was a pretty X-games day coz I went wakeboarding all afternoon and then roller blading in the evening till past 11! Ahhhh the vigor of youth. (Wat?!)

But what I wanna talk about here is not about my day. Rather, its about a serious thought that I had. See, while I was wakeboarding with Sharon and her cell group member Susanna, it was revealed that Susanna actually owns a house in Sebana! Ohhhh the wonderful memories of Sebana. The peaceful, serene environment. The calm and smooth waters. Wakeboarding Mecca I call it. Its great for the occasional getaway retreat. What a great place to have a cell group meeting!

Soon after we ended the wakeboarding session, we were talking about organising another one in 2 weeks and apparently, heaps of cell group members were very keen to come. I asked my own cell group and the response was good too. In fact, we'd probably have to book 4 boats to accommodate everyone at the current count. Christians love wakeboarding! Well the Christians in my zone at least.

So, we've covered 2 things so far. Susanna's house in Sebana. Cell group members wanna wakeboard. Following me so far? Coz here comes my brilliant idea. Why don't we buy our own wakeboard boat? Our very own ZONE BOAT. Sweeeeet. We could organise cell group meetings in Sebana where the boat could be docked (docking in Singapore would cost too much) and have whole weekends of wakeboarding in clear flat water!

Now, Yalan's zone comprises of 7 cell groups. Each cell averages 15 members. That gives us 105 individuals. Seeing how we pay cell group fund every month, we could set up a zone boat fund. So, a proper wakeboard boat like a mastercraft X series would cost around $80K. Divide that amount by a period of 12 months and 105 individuals, the monthly contribution to the Zone Boat fund would work out to be around $63.50 per member! Roughly the price of one wakeboard session. Brilliant! Hur hur hur. I wonder if the relevant individuals are reading this entry?

Fugu?

2006-09-22T12:27:00.000-07:00

Konichiwa!

Did I ever mention that I'm an ardent fan of Japanese food? I love everything Japanese that's edible. Sushi, Sashimi, hand rolls, tariyaki, wasabi, tempura, ramen (EXCEPT THOSE FROM AJISEN!!!!) etc etc. You catch my drift. So it wasn't much surprise that Nicole and I ended up at raku over at greenwood for Japanese before she left. As usual, the food there was good. Fresh and delectable.

One thing that stood out that night though, was the Fugu. Now Fugu is Japanese for pufferfish or blowfish and it is a Japanese delicacy.

Most of you will know that this species of fish is poisonous and can be lethal if mishandled. It is the only dish that the emperor of Japan is banned from consuming and only select chefs with proper training and certification can prepare it. Well, I spied "Fugu" in the menu and immediately I was on the case! Wow! Another fear factor moment! A brush with death maybe? Anyone recall my food adventure involving the sea urchin? Sweeeet.

So I ordered and it took a while for it to come and when it finally did, I was perplexed. You see, in my mind I was expecting a soft, fleshy white dish a-la-sashimi. However what was served were thin brown strips of meat. It looked almost like jerky. Nicole was stumped as well but she prayed for safety anyway. So what happened next? We ate it of course. And this was the weird part, almost immediately an intense pain shot up my throat and up into my head! Everything was turning white and I started foaming and seizing!! I WAS DYING!!!! And then Nicole's voice totally pierced through my imagination and brought me back to reality. "It tastes weird huh? Like meat..." I was chewing on it too and you know what? It did taste like meat. In fact it tasted exactly like Bak Kwa! Bak Kwa is roasted slices of marinated pork, usually eaten as a snack.

How disappointing! They could've cut up a slice of bak kwa into strips and served it to me saying it was fugu and I wouldn't even have known! How come its brown and meaty anyway? How did the fish get that way? Nicole reckons its dried or preserved and all they did was heat it up and serve it with Japanese mayo. Sheesh, what a letdown. I guess I gotta go to Japan if I wanna try the real thing. So my fugu experience wasn't much of a "living-on-the-edge" one but at least I enjoyed dinner. I wonder if there are other places that serve fugu? And the REAL thing. Not some preserved jerky bak kwa wannabe.....

Brain stimulant

2006-09-19T10:05:00.000-07:00

Has it come down to this? I have run out of ideas on what to write about. My regular posts filled with sarcastic humor have turned into bland and lame entries. I don't even know what kind of comics to make anymore! Where has all the nonsensilism gone?? The very essence of this blog has been lost.

Wanting to add a new post, yet not knowing what to write about the other day, I decided to look through my archives to see what I've been blogging about in the past. What I read were fun thoughts and ideas. Some mischevious, some sarcastic, some creative even. Well there were a few angry posts but we'll let those slide. So I sit here wondering, whats become of that spark that used to ignite the creativity and the words? How come I've not been able to create interesting articles for people to read?

I think I'll attribute it to my current state in life. Nothing's happening for me right now. I'm not having much fun, I'm not having great experiences and I have nothing to think about nor talk about. There's nothing to arouse my curiosity or to stimulate my mind. There's nothing that is provoking thoughts and ideas that I can repackage into a blog entry. My toe nail that died while snowboarding finally dropped off today. Thats all I can think of right now.

I'm not upset or uncomfortable or anything, but I'm not very happening either. Bugger. Well at least some of my shows have returned. Prison break and House are downloading as we speak and I hear that Lost and Grey's anatomy are starting soon. Save meeeeee

what REALLY happened on Buller

2006-09-18T10:50:00.000-07:00

as before, click for a bigger view

Joyce's Birthday BBQ

2006-09-10T06:13:00.000-07:00

Click on it for the bigger version. Its easier to read that way. Duh.

riding habits

2006-09-10T03:51:00.000-07:00

Greetings y'all!

Having returned to Singapore for almost 2 weeks now, I am still having the occasional withdrawal symptoms from Melbourne and Snowboarding. SO! What better way to get my mind off things than to go wakeboarding? Yup, I totally dig being strapped to a board and moving around sideways at speed.

As fate would have it, Melissa and her friends decided to go and they extended an invitation to yours truely. Everything started off pretty well. The weather was good, the company was awesome and the water was acceptable (for a Saturday) but when it was time for me to hit the water, imagine the horror when I realised my riding was all stuffed up! I literally was, HITTING the water! Almost every jump I launched ended in disaster! I was crashing and crashing, but the funny thing was, I was crashing in a weird way. Not the normal "jump gone wrong" crashes I was used to. Rather, I found my body rotating a little in mid air and I would land in a weird position and SPLASH.

Being back on the boat after my run, I pondered for a bit and then I realised where my troubles lay. I've developed bad habits from snowboarding! It dawned upon me that when I was launching jumps on my snowboard, I'd look down towards the snow to spot my landing, my board would sometimes be rotating in the air and my hands are usually flailing around to keep my balance in check. Now, you try doing that while wakeboarding and what do you get? A crash. Why? Simple, coz you gotta keep your hands on the rope handle! DUH.

So I guess I gotta work on correcting those bad habits on my next session. I wonder when will that be? Anyone wanna go?

Ajisen Ramen Poison

2006-09-06T21:03:00.000-07:00

I've been up all night. Diarrhea, Vomiting, Fever and cold sweats. Its miserable and I feel like crap now. My body feels like it got hit by a truck. I can barely move my limbs around. Never, NEVER eat at Ajisen Ramen. Its a pathetic and sorry excuse for Japanese food. The service was bad and the food tastes like crap. And to top it off, it makes you sick. The first time I had it, I got sick. Last night after eating the worst Ramen I've ever had, I spied the "Ajisen Ramen" logo at the bottom of the reciept and it all made sense. The restaurant at the Takashimaya food court was part of the Ajisen Ramen chain. And surprise surprise the poison struck again. Bastards. I'm calling the health ministry straight after this post.

Coming to a TV screen near you.....

2006-09-05T10:23:00.000-07:00

Hahaha! Its complete! My snowboarding documentary is done! After 4 full days (and nights) of going through the footage and pieceing the segments together, I can safely say that I have managed to capture the true essence of my snowboarding adventures! This has got to be the most fun I've had making a video yet! Sweeeeeet!

For all the wonderful people involved in it, you'll be getting a copy in your mail soon! Hahahahahaha. In case I forget, you can place an order here. Laterrrrrr.

on the fly

2006-09-01T13:16:00.000-07:00

This explains why I love snowboarding. Here's Brian, Wilfred and Grace catching air too! Sweeeeet!

Beyond now

2006-08-30T21:46:00.000-07:00

Hola!

Phew time for a break. A break from browsing through the papers, scoping out potential jobs. At the corner of my eye, almost out of view I spy my snowboard lying idly next to my guitar. Is that a layer of dust collecting already? Or maybe its just the plastic cover its in. Oh I do miss Melbourne so. My friends, the snow and the cool climate.

I'm not meant to be stuck at a desk, looking at the computer screen. I was built to be launched out into the great outdoors, conquer the unknown, freeze in the snow, you know? So in the midst of the job hunt, I asked my mom what she'd think if I decided to be a snowboarding instructor. She said, "Sure, if thats what you want." How cool is that?? I'm starting to think that my mom may be a misplaced citizen like me.

But alas, the results of my search wasn't promising. The average cost for an instructor's course lingered around the ₤6000 mark. YES! Six Thousand Pounds! Thats like almost 20 grand in singapore dollars. Of course it includes a season pass good for mountains in Canada (read: WHISTLER BLACKCOOMB), food and lodging for 11 weeks and of course, training and certification exam fees. ₤6000.....Groan.

I guess its kinda like taking a course in uni. I cannot justify asking my parents to pay for it though, they've already provided me with so much, more than I could ask for. I came to a conclusion that maybe I'll work for a couple of years, get sick of the corporate world and by then I would've saved enough to embark on this.....let's call it a sabbatical. Sweeeet.

But then I started thinking and then I realised, what if......what if I was in a stable relationship, or worse, what if I was married? I wouldn't be able to just take off and go. The course itself is 3 months, and if I wanna make use of that certification, I'd be teaching kids how to snowboard in snowfields all over the world. Such is the dilemma of a soon to be 27 year old. Is it now or never?

A life of eternal winters wondering snow fields round the globe, or a life in Singapore with a stable job and maybe my soulmate?

farewell my love

2006-08-23T17:58:00.000-07:00

My run here in Australia has ended. I cannot believe how fast 1 month and 3 days can go by so quickly. The time has come where I have to reluctantly pack my bags and drag myself to the airport.

I had a great time though and I'm thankful that I was able to delay my return by 2 weeks. That extra time gave me the opportunity to enjoy some of the best experiences of the holiday. Epic snowboarding trips. New friends made and great relationships established. Great times over food and at beautiful places. The only drawback is that its making my return to Singapore a little harder.

Well, to sum things up, here's what I'm thankful for:

1) First and foremost, I gotta thank God for blessing me with such a great holiday and the chance to have it.

2) The SNOW! That's the main reason why I came back to begin with! OH and the great chance to ride my custom X. I managed to visit all three mountains as planned and each trip was made amazing by the company of people I was with. My riding has improved and I've got heaps of great photos and videos to seal in the memories.

3) The boys at no.20 Lansell Road. Wilfred, Josh and Brian. You guys have been a great bunch to hang out with and I'm glad to have been able to get to know you all better! Thanks for letting me crash there most of my trip and for being so gracious with my needs. I had heaps of fun with you all up in the mountains and in melbourne.

4) Eunice over at Malvern. My other dwelling place. Thanks for letting me stay at your apartment and invading your "warehouse". You've been so sweet and I just wanna thank you for letting me stay for that week or so. I'm glad to see your leather journals and diaries and photoalbums picking up. They're beautiful! everyone should have one. More on that in a later post....

5) Great friends I've made along the way. I'm glad I got the chance to hang out with my uni / engineering friends and then make new friends in the process! By alphabetical order: Alan, a fellow snowboarding fanatic, I hope your butt recovers soon so that you can get some spring boarding done man! Bee, you're a blast to hang out with and I enjoyed getting to know you better this time round. I pray that things will go smooth for you and that you'll be smiling all the time! Randy, you're still as goofy as ever and a great buddy to chill out with. At least we hit falls creek together so the promise to ride together this winter was kept. Ru O, you're a barrel of laughs man. It was fun snowboarding with ya and thanks for the jokes in the long car rides. And last but not least, YEN! We finally meet after passing by each other at various events and probably even in the campus centre. 3 years in Monash and I only get to know you when I'm back here for a holiday. Better late than never I guess. Thanks for being such a sweetie. I really enjoyed hanging out with you and getting to know you better. I hope someday we'll get that hot chocolate under the stars.

6) My amazing church friends. Here's a big shout out to this amazing bunch of people who made my non-snowboarding days in melbourne amazing! Thanks for the dinners and that final farewell at HRC! I had a great time fellowshipping with you all! Buzz me for the pictures ok? I have heaps and heaps. See you all in Singspore soon!

Oh there's so much more to be thankful for but it seems I have to start packing my bags now if I wanna get on that plane back to Singapore. hmmmmmm.......

THANKS FOR THE GREAT HOLIDAY!

blue moon

2006-08-20T06:01:00.000-07:00

Anyone looked up into the night sky and saw the blue moon today? I didn't. What I did see was this blue tram ticket and it was in my pocket. Yeap! For the first time in my existance in Australia, I have taken the tram. One of Melbourne's most basic form of public transport, I found myself getting into one after finding myself all alone in the house and needing to get to the city.

Wilfred's reaction kinda summed it up. "How did you go to the city today? HUH? YOU WHAT?" I must confess that the tram ride was quite pleasant, though the tram hardly moved at the speed of light. It was more like taking a slow relaxed stroll. No rush, no stress. It was quite a good way to take in the urban sights and admire the odd architectural gem. It was also a great chance to put my iPod nano to use. I do miss the times when I enjoy my tunes through earphones as I watch faces come and go on public transport.

It also gave me a chance to spend some time with myself. Sitting there I could ponder upon what I wanted to do with my life. What jobs I'd like to try out. What kind of girl I want to date. How I'm gonna draw closer to God. How I should land that heelside 3 when I launch off a jump.... you know? the important things in life. But seriously, I didn't expect to enjoy taking the tram and I'm thinking that maybe I should take the bus or train now and then just for the kick of it. I reckon it would be a good experience too, being on the bus with no specific destination in mind. Just to be along for the ride and see where it leads you. I'd enjoy that. Someone told me thats what sagittariuses do. They wonder around and enjoy life. Sounds good to me.

Till my next post, take deep breaths and enjoy what life serves up!

New friends I got to (s)know.

2006-08-17T07:57:00.000-07:00

Greetings friends and passers-by!

Looking at the little window on my watch with the date dial reminds me that I have a week left in Australia. Yes, my snowboarding adventures are drawing to a close. With only 2 more day trips left in the plan, I can safely say that its been a blast. I've also met my goal to visit the 3 main ski resorts in Victoria. Yes! I've conquered Hotham, Fallscreek and Buller all in one season.

The new snowboard is phenomenal. I can ride faster, pop higher and carve harder. Its like riding a magic carpet! Furthermore, being a white board, you can barely see any scratches or marks when dumbass skiers run over your board at the chairlift line. It still looks brand new. Sweeeet.

The weather has been pretty good to me. God has blessed me with pretty good snow for some decent fun. This season's riding has definately stepped up a notch. Amen to that! But the most important point to be raving about has gotta be the great company I've had on this trip and the big bunch of friends I've made through the snow! Thanks for all the smashing fun and awesome memories.

As you can tell from the few photos I've placed around this post, I was with great company and it was a blast. Till my next snow season!

Lima Beans

2006-08-08T23:22:00.000-07:00

Hey Y'all! First off, I have to apologise for the recent entries on my blog. I was just looking through it and realised that I've been talking non stop about snowboarding! This must be boring some of you to death! I mean, not everyone has an interest in this topic and yet I keep going on and on about it. Therefore, I have decided to talk about something else in this entry. Something that I'm sure we all hold dear to our hearts. Lima beans.

The Lima bean or butter bean is grown as a vegetable for its mature and immature beans. The small-seeded wild form (Sieva type) is found distributed from Mexico to Argentina, generally below 1600 meters above sea level, while the large-seeded wild form (Lima type) is found distributed in Ecuador and the north of Peru, between 320 and 2030 meters above sea level. The pods are up to 15 cm long. The mature seeds are 1 to 3 cm long and oval to kidney shaped. White seeds are common, but black, red, orange and variously mottled seeds are also known. The immature seeds are uniformly green.

The lima bean is palatable and nutritious both immature as a fresh vegetable and mature as a dry pulse. Dry lima beans require lengthy soaking of about twelve hours and thorough cooking. Both soaking water and cooking water should be discarded to eliminate flatulence-inducing oligosaccharides.

The lima bean is a perennial plant usually cultivated as an annual plant. It prefers warm temperatures, but is tolerant of drought. To plant lima beans properly, the soil temperature needs to be at least 60 degrees Fahrenheit. If the soil is 5 degrees colder than that, mortality in the beans may occur.

Righto. To conclude, great wisdom can be gained from this entry. Therefore, if you wanna induce flatulence, you should ingest the soaking or cooking water thats used to prepare the Lima beans! Sweeeeeet.

snowboarding zombie

2006-08-08T00:29:00.000-07:00

MAN! A dumbass SKIER skied straight over my board and stripped my quiksilver sticker off the font off my board! ARGH! Is it so difficult to pretend to be sponsered by quiksilver? Why did you have to ski over my board? There I was minding my own business. Sheesh. Oh well, luckily I have a few more of those stickers. *ahem*

Right, enough ranting. Its just that I get so moody when I'm back in Melbourne waiting for the next snowboard trip. True to my Chinese zodiac sign, the mountain goat in me is one with the mountain. (hmmm is it a mountain goat? or just a regular goat?) Don't get me wrong, I love Melbourne! But I liked it a lot more when I had my own car, my own place, my own space. Relying on people for lodging and transport really gets me down. Sleeping in someone's living room, driving someone else's car, asking my hosts what the plans are for dinner....its just not me. I like to get out there and get things done, when I want and how I want.

Besides, I feel bad getting in the way of the people who are nice enough to put me up. Thanks to Wilfred during my first 10 days here and now Eunice. You guys have been great. I'll be out of your hair soon ok?

Hmmmm, though it kinda contradicts my decision to extend my stay here for 2 more weeks huh? Oh, did I forget to mention that I'll be here till the 24th of August? I decided against returning on the original date on the 10th coz there's still so much snowboarding to be done! Bring it on!!! hmmmm, what was I talking about again?

sore bum but going strong

2006-08-01T23:42:00.000-07:00

Hey y'all!

Found some time on my hands so I decided to have a quick little update on this bloggo thing-a-magik. As some of you know, I'm still in Melbourne and getting a fair bit of snowboarding done! The snow conditions have really been picking up and it gets better and better with every ride!

Of course, having better snow conditions also means its much colder too. And nothing beats the cold than taking a break on a cafe on top of the snow covered mountain with a hot chocolate and 2 marshmellows in it. Pure bliss! One thing that's spoiling my enjoyment is my sore bum. It hurts so bad when I sit or move around too much. Its the result of crashing too much when your snowboarding stunts go awry I guess. Its funny though, snowboarding. I love it so much but if you think about it, this is quite a mental, physical and financial test.

You see, the cost of going on a snowboarding holiday is phenomenal. Lodging in the mountain is expensive. Food is expensive. Chair lift tickets are expensive. If you rent gear, its gonna cost a bit too. Now, when all that is said and done, you're finally on the mountain and zipping around, and then you crash. You try to get some air, go for jumps, you crash again. Infact, even beginners who are learning on the baby slopes will soon realise that there is a lot of crashing to be done. And then come the aches and sores and pains the morning after. Epic I tell ya. Now finally, comes the cold bit. After boarding down a run, you gotta take the chairlift back up again. Its during those few minutes where you hit the lowest morale in the whole experience. You're sitting on the chairlift, the wind is blowing at sub zero temperatures and you're struggling to keep warm. The wind and snow pounding at your face and other peeks of exposed skin sends painful cold shivers through you. Its miserable.

Yet, despite all that, Snowboarding rocks I tell ya. The freedom and the speed. Zipping around the mountain. Landing your jumps and tricks. Its an amazing feeling. I hope everyone gets to go at least once in their life and enjoy it! Righto, I better go lie down and rest up so that I can recover in time for my next adventure! 3 more days! wooo hooooooo!

Back in Melbourne

2006-07-24T19:39:00.000-07:00

Wooooo! Its a day to a week since I've returned to Melbourne and what a week its been! I love the cold. I love it when its so cold out that your fingers feel like ice and you can see your own breath. Somehow, a steaming hot cup of tea always tastes better in cold climates. Brilliant!

So, what have I been up to? Well the first thing I did was go for a cell group meeting! haha. So holy I am. It was good to be reunited with friends from my Church in Melbourne. There were new faces too and it was a blast.

And then the highlight of the week. Snowboarding! We took a drive up on Friday to Falls Creek with Wilfred's friends and terrorised the slopes till Sunday. It was great to be back on the snow again and I finally get to ride my new snowboard and boy! does it shred on the snow. So smooth and zippy. Though at the end of the trip, my bum hurt like crazy coz of all the crashes sustained from numerous jumps. But it was good. Kudos to Brian who managed to pick up the sport of snowboarding. It was his first time and I think he did good.

I would post pictures up but blogger isn't allowing me to for some funny reason. Anyhow, I gotta go make a nice cup of earl grey and watch a movie on the sofa now. Need to rest and recover for my next snow trip on Thursday. Till then.......take care everyone!

sausage roll

2006-07-16T11:34:00.000-07:00

Click on the comic for a bigger version

Wall of friends

2006-07-15T12:52:00.000-07:00

Hey y'all!

The wall of friends has GROWN! go check it out! see if you can find your faces there and if somehow I've missed you (or you just can't find your face), give me a holler and I'll get straight on it!

you can check the wall out here.

Coldplay went by at the speed of sound

2006-07-10T08:52:00.000-07:00

Yes! I finally caught my favourite band, Coldplay, in concert. I missed the last chance I had to watch them when they went to Melbourne but as luck would have it, their tour came to Singapore!

Concerts are even better when in the company of good friends, and this one was no exception. Jialing, Adrian, Geri, Pierre, Jason and Anna were right there in the thick of it with me. Jumping and singing and cheering and clapping.

From the moment the first song was unleashed and the lightings fired up, it was pure electricity and aural pleasure! Coldplay sang all the favourites and the crowd was definately pleased. My personal favourites were all there. God put a smile upon my face, YELLOW, the scientist, clocks, speed of sound... the list goes on and on. And what a performance the band put on! It was also fun to see the giant confetti filled yellow ballons bounce around when yellow played.

Now that the concert's over, and the Fifa world cup has also concluded, I only have snowboarding left to look forward to. LOOOOOOK AT THE STARRRRRS! LOOOOOK HOW THEY SHINE FOR YOUUUUUUUUU.

Post-wakeboarding

2006-06-19T06:36:00.000-07:00

Sunday came and went, and what a Sunday it was! I finally got to wakeboard and the weather was awesome! The company was great too. A fun bunch from my cell group made it possible. However, the day wasn't without drawbacks. You see, the many times I've been wakeboarding at Punggol Marina, I always walk by a PINK coloured boat and I'll chuckle to myself. This particular boat looked like it was designed by Mattel for their most famous export, Barbie. It had pink trimmings and a pink canopy and pink sides and pink seats and probably a pink motor if you peeked under the hood. I'd always think to myself, "Gosh, thats a gay one. I'll never be caught in that."

So there I was, lugging my wakeboard and chugging along when I asked the driver which boat we were taking out. You can imagine my horror when he stopped in his tracks next to the pink boat and said, "this one."

Of course, Adrian had failed to mention that he had randomly booked the boats and he'd been assigned a boat called the Pinky X5. PINKY X5!! It even had a GAY name!! We were riding the PINK GAY BOAT!!! You can see that I wasn't too pleased. Thats the last time I'll let Adrian book the boats. Oh well.

So we were off. Split into 2 groups, I had Adrian, Rina and Ruth in *ahem* the pinky x5. But it was a blast! We had a great time laughing at each other and snapping pictures. It was great seeing them learn how to wakeboard. There was a lot of yelling going on too, mostly me screaming at them to squat like an ah beng. The other boat of Anne, Diana, Alan and Jason (was his name Jason? I cannot remember) whizzed by us a few times too. They seemed to be doing well and we even managed to catch a few shots of them.

At the end of the day, everyone had a great time and sun kissed skin. Then it was off to Jalan Kayu for Briani, mee goreng and prata. Can't wait till the next time we go riding again! Later!

Pre-Wakeboarding

2006-06-17T17:15:00.000-07:00

Yay! found some church friends to go wakeboarding with! The sun is out and the morning looks great! No jellyfish please. weeeeee

How do you.....

2006-06-02T13:38:00.000-07:00

.....get on this panel here at the start page of your blogger account? They say here that these are the blogs they've "noticed" recently, and they're encouraging us to have a look if we feel like browsing. How does your blog get "noticed"? Who does the noticing? Could it be there's some dedicated blogger staff sitting in some dark dinghy room, staring at their computers and running through the entire database screening and browsing every blog on their system? And then suddenly, EUREKA! Check it out guys! here's an interesting blog that everyone should browse to! OOHHH let's put in on the "noticed" panel!

This panel, though capable of providing some material to glance at during times of boredom, is bothersome. Well bothersome to me at least. And in a number of ways too. Firstly, how do they decide which blogs to feature? The internet is a gargantuan network of computers and therefore, plays host to a ginormous amount of people at any single moment. Are there a set of guidelines to follow in order to ensure that most, if not all, of the possible interest groups are met? Could there be a person who actually clicked on every single featured blog and find nothing ineresting at all?

I clicked on some of them and was flabbergasted to find some really boring blogs in there. One showed nothing but the author's pet dog (and a really ugly one too) and another had heaps and heaps of programming jargon in there. I am in no way saying that my blog is any better and frankly, I think its filled with rubbish, but these other blogs are FEATURED! Blogger actually thinks they are worth checking out! Who does the quality control? Or maybe its just a computer program that randomly spits out a blog onto that list.

Now if its not a computer program, and someone at blogger actually thinks that a blog has content worth showcasing, does that mean that people are sifting through our blogs? Is this like a "big brother" thing where everything we say and publish is being scrutinised and kept under the watchful eye of some blogger government? Will we be eliminated or have our accounts suspended if we mention something that upsets them?

So whats up with that panel? Is it a geniune spot to showcase outstanding blogs? Or is it a subtle warning to let you know that an all seeing entity is keeping tabs on what you say. eerie.

The Great Singapore Idol Diet

2006-06-01T03:34:00.001-07:00

Alright all you fatties and people who are not fat but are worried about getting fat or just people who even bother to "diet"! I've got a good one for ya! The Great Singapore idol Diet!

I had the misfortune of having the television set switched on at around 11:37pm yesterday and right after the episode of "without a trace", channel 5 ran a little trailer showcasing some contestants fighting for a spot in the finals in the second season of Singapore Idol. Pick up your phones and vote NOW! YOU get to CHOOSE who enters the finals!.....Blared my TV set. And then the horror began. You know how it is when there's an inexplicably ugly or horrid freakish creature in a cage at those weird carnivals, and even though you knew you'd feel sick looking at it but you just had to sneak a peek? Well, my neck muscles twitched and instinctively turned my head towards the TV screen. I watched the snippets of the contestants singing and grooving to the songs. Well, I think they were singing, or at least trying to sing. And no, there was no groove at all. These are the people that our judges have filtered out and come up with?

And then it hit me. The nauseous feeling right from the pits of my gut. The half a pint of Ben & Jerry's phish food, half a bag of tapioca chips and a can of coke that I had guzzled down during "without a trace" started to churn within me as if some delicate chemical balance had been upset. "Why is this happening?" I wondered to myself. My junk food always went down well no matter what the conditions were. What's different this time round? I analysed the situation, trying to figure out a differential diagnosis.

The Idol jingle at the end of the commercial sparked of a giant halogen lamp on top of my head, shedding light on my query. Singapore Idol was making me sick. Just watching those people perform made my guts cringe. Why do they even bother? It was total rubbish and sickeningly abysmal. What good could come out of such a horrid program?

Gosh if a short teaser like this could make me almost throw up my yummies, what would a full hour long episode do?! Aha! catch my drift? See where this is heading? The Great Singapore Idol Diet! Simple. Just watch it during dinner (its around dinner time anyway) and TADA! everything will come straight out and no extra calories for the night! In fact, endure your hunger during dinner time and wait for the show to start! You'll lose your appetite straight away. Problem solved and no vomiting required. For those going for a more extreme solution, you can record it and play it back during various meal times or when you feel hungry. Don't overdo it though coz you still need to feed your body to maintain normal body functions. And the best thing is, you get a fresh dose every week in case you start to get used to the current prescription! Brilliant!

So go forth and take advantage of this great diet programme and you'll be losing the kilos in no time! No charge for this one. Later!

Give me back my TV!

2006-05-30T07:48:00.000-07:00

My life as I know it is over. Once again, it is the time of the year where good TV shows in the US come to an end. As summer approaches, prime time TV in America all draw to an end, leaving us, the faithful watchers, lost. Our minds are wrecked with anxiety and curiosity. Oh those damned cliffhangers!

(House MD) Whatever happens to Dr House? Will he survive his bullet wounds?

(the O.C) What will the OC be like without Marissa? Will the show still be called "the O.C" when all the kids are going to universities that are NOT in Orange County?

(Lost) What the heck is happening to the survivors lost on that weird island? and Desmond's girlfriend?! How did she get into the picture? Do Micheal and Walt really escape the island?

(Grey's Anatomy) Who will Meredith Grey choose? Is izzy really quiting the SGH internship programme??

(invasion) Will the aliens prevail and take over the world and complete their invasion?

(surface) Will the undersea creatures take over the world and surface?

(Prison break) Where are Micheal Scolfield and his gang run? Can they outrun the police or will they be caught again?

(24) The president got assassinated?! Again??

And the biggest question of them all. WHAT AM I GONNA DO NOW THAT I HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO WATCH?!

sigh.

I crave pancakes

2006-05-12T12:27:00.000-07:00

Righto. How is everyone today? Jolly good I hope? I am in dire need of some advice right now. Being stuck on this little island country of Singapore, would anyone happen to know where I could get some quality pancakes for breakfast. And no, not those crappy hotcakes from MacDonalds. I'm talking about fluffy, steamy, airy buttermilk pancakes. Preferably with blueberries and a dollop of butter. Oh and some side servings of fried mushrooms, sunny side up eggs, rashers of bacon and chucky hashbrowns. Oh the memories of USA's iHop and Australia's pancake parlour. Help! Anyone?

epiphanical post

2006-05-10T05:45:00.000-07:00

Whilst having ice cream with a close friend recently, she causually remarked that she had wasted a considerable amount of effort typing my "ridiculously long" blog address on her web browser, only to be greeted with an entry that she had read ages ago. "You don't update it anymore!" she said. "How can we be updated with the latest happenings in your life?"

Haven't you heard of a book mark you cow? And you can call me on the phone to see whats up can't ya? Well, I didn't say that, but those words went through my head. I brushed it off and said that there's nothing much to blog about anyway. And its true. The amount of fun and creativity I have in my blog entries, are directly proportional to how happening my life is. And honestly, my life is experiencing zilch right now.

I don't do much and go out much so I don't take pictures. I meet people now and then to do mundane things so there's nothing amazing or mentally stimulating going on. There's just nothing going in my life right now thats worth blogging about. And with each passing day, I get lazier and lazier and hence no activity on my blog.

so whats the point of this entry? nothing. absolutely nothing. ok bye.

Dream of Randomy

2006-04-22T11:57:00.000-07:00

My head was buried in a nice big fluffy pillow and I was hugging my soft comfy bolster. The giant quilt wrapped around me doubled as both a mattress under me and a blanket keeping me warm. And there I was lying down on the lift landing in between 2 lifts on the 12th floor of some apartment.

I was constantly looking at my mobile phone wondering when Melissa would call. I was also trying to recall what floor she lived on ( Melissa lives in a landed house at Chaun Drive dumbo.). I was on the 12th floor, but I had the feeling that she actually resided on the 10th. Then I decided, I didn't want to lie down there anymore coz its dirty and totally weird to be lying on the floor with a pillow, a bolster and a quilt in a public area ( no shit einstein ). So I got up and pressed the down button for the elevator.

When it arrived, I got in, carrying my pillow, bolster and quilt in a huge bundle. As I was walking through the doors hugging my bundle, 2 people rushed into the lift, almost shoving me aside in the process. For some reason I could tell they were brother and sister. Maybe coz they looked alike. They both had slightly deformed looking faces, well not really deformed, but they had features that were not normal. It was kinda like features of mentally retarded people. I tried not to make eye contact even though I was kinda peeved at them for being so rude. They started talking in English, but I couldn't understand a single word they uttered.

The elevator stopped at the 10th floor and a lady got in. She was slightly on the bulky side and she was dressed very plainly. She was also carrying a black leather sling bag. For some funny reason she stood right in front of me. Her face straight at my face. I couldn't help but notice that she had a cleft upper lip. The elevator went down a floor and suddenly she muttered, "Darren? Don't you remember me?" My brain was sent racing. Who was this woman? Was she from my advanced diploma course? The one I took during my army days? "Are you......my classmate?" I stuttered. She used both hands to pull me to a corner of the elevator. " We went Mt.Buller together remember? don't tell me you've forgotten?" she said. Her eyes seemed to reflect a pained emotion, as if I had hurt her for not remembering her.

"Buller?" I muttered and then the elevator reached the ground floor. Everyone got out of it and the odd sibling pair walked off. I was left there standing in front of this mystery woman, trying to recollect all my snowboarding trips. I couldn't place her anywhere. And then I woke up.

I was having another totally weird, random and nonsensical dream. I've been getting a lot of it lately. I wonder why. Maybe I'm going insane. AND NOW I CAN'T GO BACK TO SLEEP COZ I'M SO AWAKE!!! AAARRRGGGGHHHHH. so here I am documenting my dream. Sheesh.

On a side note, the song "breathe" by Anna Nalick is totally awesome! Just wanted to share this with all my fellow music lovers out there. LAter.

Geunomeun meoshiteotda

2006-04-02T00:53:00.000-08:00

I think it means "the guy was gorgeous and cool" or some shit like that. Its the title of a korean movie DVD. Kim (my sister) came knocking on my door askin," hey BRUDDER. can you copy a DVD for me?" Being the king in technology of the house on Meragi road, I said no problem without even batting an eyelid.

So here I am at my under-utilised powerhouse computer, making a copy of this DVD and I couldn't help but notice the synopsis on the back of the DVD cover.

And I Quote"
Silver the saint is still the high senior high school living, come from well off family, the looks is surprisingly handsome and talented, and is still cause, his personality that one of the king of high and well known four greatest dayseses (???), because of the financial situation irascible (???), the does not tame, is filled withed the treachery consciousness. The beautiful and male of pattern revolts the saint of young silver to from here had the ream all young girl is it the madness's factor, place that arrive do is a baking hot vision of girls. It is ordinary that is a high student, outlooking of woman, but is filled withed the vitality, personality lovely. Soon opened to learn.
" unQuote.

Holy COW! how mind boggling is that?? I mean, after reading that you just gotta watch the movie man. You can't pass up a show with such an intriguing and mind blowing synopsis! I mean, whats happening? Whats gonna happen? WHAT IS IT ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE?! Whoa. intense and totally deep man. trippy. Can't wait to pop the DVD into my DVD player of being high technology and best visual entertainment in surprising unity family room. see? I can talk like them now. sweeeet.

brokenspacebar

2006-03-31T00:41:00.000-08:00

Thisiswhatmypostwouldlooklikeifmyspacebarwasbroken.Allofmywordswouldbestucktogether
andtheonlyhintofsegmentationwouldbeinthepunctuations.Itisquiteannoyingtoreadisn'tit?Infact,Ireckonitwouldbealmostimposssibletoreadespeciallyifyouwerejustglancingthroughtohave
aquickupdateonmylife.wouldyouevenbotherreadingit.Iguessyouwouldsinceyou'vealreadyreadtill
thispoint.Idon'tthinkitsgoodfortheeyesthough,butitwilldefinatelybeaworkoutforthebrainseeing
howitwouldneedtodecipherthewordsinthesentanceandwhereitstartsandends.doyouactuallyhear
yourselfreadinyourmind.youwouldprobablysoundlikearobotreadingthisentrycozthatshowisound
liketomyselftypingthis.atthesametime,asIreadthisentry,myeyesarealsomovingconstantlyfrontand
backcozsomeofthewordskindamakenewwordswiththenextwordwhenstucktogetherlikethat.itsquite
amusingcozitsliketheeyesandthemindaresendingconflictingsignalsandeverythinghastobere
examined,whichisunnatural.anyhow,i'mgettingsickofthisandatthesametimemytypingisgetting
affectedcozmyhandsaregettingusedtonothittingthespacebar.bye

without you near

2006-03-26T02:35:00.000-08:00

its starting to get lonely and dark. I can't see much further. Where do you go from here.

How can you sit there watching, talking, to someone you think is me?

You think I'll fly, run, jump, when I'm just a rock embedded in a clump of weeds.

Yet I'm slowly being ground into sand. by the consistent pelting of questions. thoughts. ideas.

I just need to sit here for a while. I don't want to roll, I'll gather moss and disappear.

the others are everywhere. fluttering around. and my distance grows further and further with every flap.

its getting lonely, but its where i'd rather be.

wear down till there's nothing left. and be blown away away by the wind.

Revisited: Leaving on a jet plane

2006-03-07T08:11:00.000-08:00

Don't know when I'll be back again.

Actually, turns out I'll be back on the 8th of March 2006.