Elephant's fart

What the hell is wrong with my neighbour?? Why does he have to rev the engine so hard in the morning and slam on the accelerator while he's maneuvering out of the narrow driveway? He thinks he's some F1 driver? and all this at 9am!! Bloody 9 in the morning!!! He thinks he's warming up the engine when all he's doing is killing it.



( Taking the term "spoiler" to a whole new level )

A little background on my neighbour first. he's this fat chinaman who dresses like he's some rapper from 8 mile. He drives this mitsubishi FTO. Now the FTO is a nice little coupe, but he thinks its a ferrari or something. Races it up and down the road like his ass is on fire and he needs to jump into a pail of water quick. An FTO usually looks pretty cool, but not his. His has been modified to the point that it looks like some spaceship from jupiter thats been hit by an asteroid on its way to earth. Its damn ah beng man. stickers everywhere that make no sense. neon glowing lights. ugly front bumper. Psycho rear wing thats the height of the airport control tower..... the list goes on


( its a bird, its a plane, no its your obnoxious neighbourhood beng-mobile )

but worse of all, the sound. oh my gosh you won't believe the crap noises it makes. Its a raspy rough course blaring F***ed up sound. You think loud is powerful??? ITs crap. it sounds like the car has lung cancer and its coughing to death man. What the hell is with that milo can at the rear of your car? is that an excuse for an exhaust?? its a bloody noise bin thats spews out nothing but pollution of sorts. I can hear him crawling all the way down the road till he parks at the train station.


( eh ah-Hew-ston, we hab a ploblerm leh )

All show and no go. thats what it is. A real car is refined. its smooth, and stealthy. Its got power, but its not apparent until you're smelling its dust while watching its tail lights disappear in front of you. You won't hear it approaching, and the only sound you'll get is the mellow hummm and the rushing wind when it glides past.

Sheesh. Rest is hard to come by in this part of town.....

[edit] no offence to people who read this and own cars with loud exhausts ya? I'm just ranting about my neighbour.